Author Topic: How long should courtship last?  (Read 12250 times)

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Offline Barde

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How long should courtship last?
« on: May 20, 2003, 01:42:20 AM »
Human beings naturally change with time and circumtance.It is partly as a result of knowledge that people go in to long courtships with their would-be spouses in order for them to be able to understand and get to know ?themselves before getting married.How ever,the question is,does this period of familiarisation always leads to a blissfull mariage?even if it leads,does the marriage last?
im

Offline ummita

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Re: MARRIAGE VS COURTSHIP?"!!! mhmmm!!!
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2003, 02:51:46 PM »
Salam,
Sincerely speakin Barde, Courtship shud last juss one day!!!
In d mornin luv @ first syt, fall inluv & start courtin
In d evenin..........get engaged
@ Nyt.......get married.......

but honestly speakin with regards 2 wat u said based on, if ppl r married wud it last?

Technically speakin, it may & it may not.......if d shoe fits in where it wud then b it!!!

Ma cozin brova always lyk quotin this:
A woman is a woman therefore she may b wooed
A woman is a woman therefore may b won!

but how far true iz that?

Even thou luv & marriage, luv & marriage go 2gether hand in hand lyk horse & cariage but still
those words of 2 hav & 2 hold from this day 4ward, 4 better or worse, for richer 4 poorer, in sickness & in health, 2 luv, cherish, & 2 obey, till death 2 us part........heck!!!!

I kan still contradict on that.

First & foremost.......not hausa men!!!! neva!!! mhm amm, naws, No absolutely no.....Du u know Igbo men keep 2 their promises better than hausa man.....thats y me & Obinna r engaged(she laffs) 8)Hey lay_deez 4 a real regular guy who wills stick 2 marriage vows & not leave u waitin in d middle of d alter, who kan call around d clock, 4 those that wanna marry till death du them part........get an Igbo man ;)

secondly 2 me marriage is d waste-paper basket of emotions
Marraige is a bribe 2 make a house keeper think she's a householder ::)
Marriage is d sign of predominators (in a sense men!)
women bcum bay_bee producin machine
& I can go on & on..............
& sumtyms most marriages dont add 2 ppl 2gether. they subtract one from d other.
Marriage in life is like a field of battle and not a bed of roses. Why? I hav neva seen ma freind 'n' her husby in gud term...always @ each others neck. May b iz bcuz she iz 2 young....nah ::)! Its obvious!!! bahaushene :P

but........well marriage & courtship mhmm :-X
Marriage works 4 alot but still :-/ :-X  :-X :-X :-X :-X :-X

But hey marriage iz sunni & Islamicity says it all, so who am I 2 argue with d first principles of Islam? Absolutely not, but I can argue with regards 2 wat Barde said bout marriage & courtship weda they work & go hand in hand..so none shud get me wrong....

Pretty difficult 2 tlk bout marriage :-/ u dont know which iz which!! Well from this onwards I will say no more.....& let no one get bck up facts 2 diagree with ma judgements..cuz I dont wan2 say no more (she laffs)..........anyways I was juss mere rantin........I think it all cumz down 2 gettin MR RIGHT for those.,,,errr  :-X

Kai this aint ma field.......let me b off 2 d nxt zone...........I heresay sum1 was tlkin bout football........this calls 4 destruction...........
Despite ur slammin, am still jammin!!!

Offline ummita

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2003, 02:58:56 PM »
Oh shud I not 4get......Barde I dey welkom u....sannu der zuwa. Join d major high way society & all 2gether ku karamaner ilimi. Nice Topic
Despite ur slammin, am still jammin!!!

Offline Nas

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Re: MARRIAGE VS COURTSHIP?"!!! mhmmm!!!
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2003, 06:23:19 PM »
Quote
Salam,
Sincerely speakin Barde, Courtship shud last juss one day!!!
In d mornin luv @ first syt, fall inluv & start courtin
In d evenin..........get engaged
@ Nyt.......get married.......

I kan still contradict on that.

First & foremost.......not hausa men!!!! neva!!! mhm amm, naws, No absolutely no.....Du u know Igbo men keep 2 their promises better than hausa man.....thats y me & Obinna r engaged(she laffs) 8)Hey lay_deez 4 a real regular guy who wills stick 2 marriage vows & not leave u waitin in d middle of d alter, who kan call around d clock, 4 those that wanna marry till death du them part........get an Igbo man ;)

secondly 2 me marriage is d waste-paper basket of emotions
Marraige is a bribe 2 make a house keeper think she's a householder ::)
Marriage is d sign of predominators (in a sense men!)
women bcum bay_bee producin machine
& I can go on & on..............
& sumtyms most marriages dont add 2 ppl 2gether. they subtract one from d other.
Marriage in life is like a field of battle and not a bed of roses. Why? I hav neva seen ma freind 'n' her husby in gud term...always @ each others neck. May b iz bcuz she iz 2 young....nah ::)! Its obvious!!! bahaushene :P


I have to say I couldnt ignore all these, haba! Meeta, ke how do you even know hausa men are not the best in keeping vows whne you have never been married before. ko kinyi ne bada saninmu ba lol.

Ummita we marry women to love them and have them as our sole mates and not because of the reasons you listed above. Haba! lol lol it was funny when I read that. Only ignorant men marry women for just those purposes. I raise my case! I have alot to say but for now, lets see what my fellow brothers have to say.
m a man of ma own words

Offline Ibro2g

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2003, 03:03:32 AM »
Nas, dont u worry...
...Haha Ummitah, u have alwaiz hated that word ;love and even feared the other: Marriage. You need to sit down, and hit some things in ur head, reason, try again, but dont run okay...and oh...tell Obinna congratulations! ;D
    
courtship lasts as long as it could, give urselvs space to understand each other, I mean no one eva spoke about time limitations ,or is there? The main essence of it is to know and understand before u make a hard decision of a life time...I shouldn`t say much
gotta go
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Offline Twinkle

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Re: MARRIAGE VS COURTSHIP?"!!! mhmmm!!!
« Reply #5 on: May 22, 2003, 05:49:57 PM »
Quote
Salam,
Sincerely speakin Barde, Courtship shud last juss one day!!!
In d mornin luv @ first syt, fall inluv & start courtin
In d evenin..........get engaged
@ Nyt.......get married.......

secondly 2 me marriage is d waste-paper basket of emotions
Marraige is a bribe 2 make a house keeper think she's a householder ::)
Marriage is d sign of predominators (in a sense men!)
women bcum bay_bee producin machine
& I can go on & on..............
&
he he he veryyyyyyyyyy GASKIYA veryyyyyyyy TRUE darling!!!


Besides men they never keep to their words. Now men dont even do anything like courtship plzzzzzz as if we care ::)
color=red]I RULE IN A UNIQUE WAY!

[/color]

Offline Barde

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Re: MARRIAGE VS COURTSHIP?"!!! mhmmm!!!
« Reply #6 on: May 23, 2003, 02:17:33 AM »
Quote
he he he veryyyyyyyyyy GASKIYA veryyyyyyyy TRUE darling!!!


Besides men they never keep to their words. Now men dont even do anything like courtship plzzzzzz as if we care ::)
Haba twinkle,how can you say that men don't keep to their words,if there are  those that don't keep to their words are women, always changing like chameleon.sorry if i may sound some how.
im

Offline Ibro2g

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #7 on: May 23, 2003, 02:50:40 AM »
Twinkle, dont let this started again! Its been on and on.
   But before it starts I gotta say one thing...Men dont keep their words in as much as women dont....so...
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Offline Fulanizzle

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #8 on: June 10, 2003, 04:03:30 PM »
all i will say is that courtship should last a lifetime....
infact it should be eternal....

even if ur married for 100 years...there should still be a courtship kinnda relationship, u know somethin to gear up and tighten the relationship, to make it last......

love doctor is out........PAZ
)

Anonymous

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #9 on: June 27, 2003, 04:24:25 PM »
hm ku jira lokacin ku ;D

Offline Fulanizzle

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #10 on: June 30, 2003, 01:10:39 PM »
hehehehe
hehehehe
hehehehh

whateva man!

that was off da hook...
)

Offline Waziri

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #11 on: July 02, 2003, 01:41:09 PM »
U r my shadow motivation
U've got me thru' d day
U r my source my of inspiration
Everything I have 2 say

U r d sunshine in my morning
U r d light along d day
But I'm giving u a warning
And place it with no delay

But if dat's not enough
There is nothing left 2 say
But u sure got me wrong
Cos' loooove, AIN'T NO HOLIDAY
NO HOLIDAY(4x)...

It was just yesterday, I could not sleep and was just playing ma Old Skool, then came up dis song: Ain't No Holiday, by Native. It was then it crossed my mind that there's some topic in dis forum that finds relevance in d content of d song. I stood up or is it stood down or is it stood sit,  I dunno. What I am sure of is dat there was a movement from my lying-down position 2 my sitting-down position 2 write d lyrics of d song: LOVE AIN'T NO HOLIDAY, NO HOLIDAY, NO HOLIDAY, NO HOLIDAY...

Ma gud ppl , since 'tis courtship we r discussing  not courtPlane,  courtBus, courtCar or courtMotorcycle  I really agree wid dis Native ppl: Love is not holiday. 'tis a process not an end; 'tis  an action not a feeling; a verb that must always be performed not an abstract noun that comes when it feels like coming. We must note here that 'tis Hollywood scripts that turned love into feeling as opposed to action. But in all d literature of any progressive societies love is understood 2 be a verb. There 4 if u found ur self in a relationship, know that 'tis not just holidaying dat keeps it but hard work and sacrifice, not even understanding or overstanding or even standing, no, Sacrifice. It really doesn't matter whether u decided to marry after 2 weeks of ur 1st meeting like Hillary and Clinton or u agreed to spend a yr together before tying it. The non-holiday activities most continue 2 proceed 4 life. 'Tis ur effort. U give it life and fate (hear dis Ummita). Dat is why after spelling out d duties   and responsibilities of husband and wife in Islam, God followed wid d strict injunction that u must continue 2 remain kind 2 each other.  After all in d above lyrics it was source of INSPIRATION it was said not EXPIRATION.

Offline al_hamza

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #12 on: July 02, 2003, 03:26:26 PM »
courtship should last 7 mins and 16 seconds
ABILUNAH? SABILUNAH? AL-JIHAD! AL-JIHAD!

Anonymous

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2003, 05:45:34 PM »
there shouldn't be courtship!

Just parents decides. as in the Hausa movies (LOL)

This is a crazy idea and should be ignored

Offline ummita

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Re: How long should courtship last?
« Reply #14 on: July 02, 2003, 09:15:30 PM »
Quote
There 4 if u found ur self in a relationship, know that 'tis not just holidaying dat keeps it but hard work and sacrifice, not even understanding or overstanding or even standing, no, Sacrifice.

Waz.......I dont think sacrifice is the bond that keeps relationships working.....because from the standpoint of pure reason, there are no good grounds 2 support d claim that one should sacrifice one's own happiness to that of others!!!

WAZIRI self-sacrifice enables us 2 sacrifice other ppl without blushing.......so wat makes u think if u can sacrifice ur life & fate 2 d gurl of ur dreams........she wont sacrifice u up 4 another man????

Trust is enough 4 a person in a relationship 2 go 2 d extend of sacrifice. Wud u sacrifice (.....lets say......those huge sum of money u hav instored in ur account 2 ur gurl) without half knowin whether she cares enough let alone trust, talkless of her makin sacrifices 4 ur sake!!?

2 luv some1 is 2 isolate him from d world, wipe out every race of him, dispossess him of his shadow, drag him in2 murdereous future. It is a circle around d other like a dead star & absorb him in2 a black light.......
if luv cud du all these...........wud u makes those sacrifices?

Marriage on d other hand is a wonderful invetion; but then again, so is a bicycle repair kit..........cuz gettin marriage is like the begining of endless arguments........



Quote
U give it life and fate (hear dis Ummita). Dat is why after spelling out d duties ? and responsibilities of husband and wife in Islam, God followed wid d strict injunction that u must continue 2 remain kind 2 each other. ?After all in d above lyrics it was source of INSPIRATION it was said not EXPIRATION.

Even wen Allah subhanawata'ala gave strict injuction that both parties should remain kind 2 each other. U tell me how many ppl r still followin this rule? How many men r obeyin these words of ALLAH? How many fateful, loyal & trust worthy men r still remain on these earth?

Why would someone dwell in2 courtin either relationship talkless of marriage givin their life & fate! wen on d other hand........not d other party is willin 2 du so 4 eternity. U know wen LOVE OR MARRAIGE really works!!!! it only works only in d beginin stages of courtin.....d lovers absense stimulates ur imagination, forming a sort of aura around him or her. But this aura fades wen u know too much wen ur imagination no longer has room like anyone else, a person whose presence is taken 4 granted. Hence if a woman sacrfices all 4 marraige or relationship, putin her life & fate! which is also a sacrifice on its own........if d man b'cums so used 2 her sacrifices he wont no longer c it that way but will obviously take it 4 granted

One more thing, 4 all those talkin bout love & relationship..........if anybody cant love HITLER, then they cant love & show love at all in a relationship!!!!!

kai this topic sef...from onwards I will remain :-X :-X(she laffs)
Despite ur slammin, am still jammin!!!

 


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