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A WOMAN'S BAD CONDUCT TOWARDS HER HUSBAND

Started by MohammedIbrahim, December 01, 2002, 03:06:06 AM

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MohammedIbrahim

Allah Most High says:
 
  And as for those women on whose part you fear bad-conduct,(first)advice them,and (then) banish them to seperate beds;and(finally) beat them (lightly).Then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them.Indeed ,Allah Most is High ,Most Great.(al-Nisa 4:34)

     <Banish them to seperate beds>means ,according to Ibn 'Abbas,the husband's  turning his back on her and not speaking to her .Shu'bi and Mujahid said that it means not to sleep with her in the same bed.

      <Beat them>means to beat the wife lightly withought causing pain or hurt.Allah Most High reminds the husband that if the wife returns to him in obidience, he should not continue to be angry with her, inventing new excuses.

     Abu Hurairah(RAA) reported Allah's Messenger(SAW) as saying:<If a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he spends the night angry, the angels curse her unti the morning>(Bukhari and Muslim).In another veeersion, he said:<By him in wose Hand is my soul, if a womam who has been called to her husband's bed refuses, the one wo is in Heaven is displeased with her until her husband is pleased with her .>(Bukhari and Muslim)

       Jabir bin ' Abdullah reported the Messenger as saying :<There are three (types of) persons whosse prayers are not accepted and whose good deeds are not raised up to Heaven: a run away slave,until he returns to his master and puts his hand in his:a woman whose husband is angry with her, until he becomes  pleased with her:and a drunk, until he becomes sober.>(Ibn Habban and Baihaqi)

       Allahs Messenger said:
                   <The first question which will be asked of a woman on the Day of Resurrection concerns her prayer and her husband.>(Anu Shaikh in Thawab al-A'mal)

         <It is not permissible for a woman who believes in Allah and the Last day to fast(apart from the fasting of Ramadan) while her husband is present except by his permission,or to allow someone in the house withought his permission.>(Bukhari)

          'Abdullah ibn 'Umar(RAA) reported  Allah's Messenger(SAW) as saying:<Allah does not look at a woman who is not grateful to her husband, as long as she is not independent of him.>

        The Prophet(SAW) also said: <When a woman goes out of her husband's house (withought his permission), the angels curse her until she returns or repents.>

       So you see dear sisters in Islam respecting ones husband is like building a house on a strong foundation,while dis-respecting ones husband is the other way round.But the male couterparts on the other hand should not take this as an advantage and ill-treat their wives.Good cordial relationship between the two parties i think will result in  a  peaceful co-existence, a marriage full of happiness and Allah's blessings(Insha-Allah),as well as a good breeding ground for children.
                                           
                                                                Salam!

Anonymous

Salaam
True Mohammad Ibrahim respecting one's husband is crucial in Islam but so also does respecting the Woman of the house. Imagine how many people will be Muslims today if they are told women had no rights commensurate to those of men in Islam?
The prophet in his last sermon cautioned couples about treating other fairly because if you look perfectly, marriage is like a scissors, one side does nothing without the other and no side can be said to be of more importance.
As to the issue of beating wives, lets remember a wife is clearly empowered by the sunna to press for Divorce ( khul'u)- initiated by the woman or talaq- by mutual understanding; if she feels mistreated. The control mechanism against misuse of the Quran and Sunna is one of the most prescient creeds on which Islam stands.
Allah knows best
A sha ruwa lafiya.

Fulanizzle

Mohammed Ibrahim, yes.......women should follow their husbands........

but that don mean that a  man should take  his woman for granted....

Shima for a guy, lutta  rules are put on the table for him to follow akan mata........

May Allah continue to guide us...........
salam
)

MohammedIbrahim

Assalamu-alaikum,

            Brothers and sisters in Islam, as I stated earlier on their should be respect for the female counterparts on the other hand.I also agree that women have their own rights and should'nt be regarded as a property(slaves).
                I am very sorry if anyone is upset but I did'nt mean to upset anybody.Once again SORRY if any one is upset.

                                                           SALAM!

Ihsan

Upset?? I see no one upset here... we do get the message u r trying to send across...and thank you for the reminder.

But maza, don't say all that applies to the woman only, it does apply to you as well...so, a kiyaye.

Allay ya taimaka.
greetings from Ihsaneey

Blaqueen

O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should you treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the dowry you have given them - except when they have become guilty of open lewdness. On the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike something and Allah will bring about through it a great deal of good. (4:19)

MEN!!!! TAKE NOTE!!!!

if u no bother ur woman... then she wont bother u...

but Moh'd... i catch ur drift! keep reppin'...
da Hunniez Gettin Money Playin Niggaz Like Dummy

Blaqueen

And for women are rights over men similar to those of men over women. (2:226)
da Hunniez Gettin Money Playin Niggaz Like Dummy

Anonymous

Orite, lemme contribute my part of privy with all d hyp men have against womens bad behaviour. Mohd' am 100% with u, absolutely ryt no doubt. but........women b it girls, mothers daughters all will have 2 go thru that marriage stage, which is of course sunni. But a mans gotta sit down 'n' think deep, y he's gettin harsh treatment from his wifey. I mean a chick wont delibrately hijack d collar of her mans tie, when he walks in @ 3.00am in d mornin and not xpect her 2 flip.

No matta d type of wife a man marries whether she has a thug heartstring behaviour... deep inside, shortiez mind is  soft heart. All u gotta du is 2 sit down 'n' tlk things over. Communication is d vital link 2 networking in marriages, which is 1 thing alot of hausa marriages lack. They cant sit down 'n' tlk things over, it will b like givin the chick under ur feet a chance 2 dominate u. Nah...tlks can help smooth out marriage & can sizzle a chichks bad misconduct. But the man of d house, d bread winner will rather unleash his anger by wippin ma shortie!! Or these dayz quick treatment 2 nasty chick is (ungo na sakeki saki 3) or kinsan ur heaven is under ma feet!! I'm'a stamp it down!!! 'n' all that...If a man is straight obviously she is gon respect him. 2 d wippin & bed seperation is Gods sayin' no doubt 2 that.
I once heard a (tarihi) which says a guy slapped his wifey & she quickly hugged him cryin & beggin 4 4givess n welcomin him 4 more slaps insistin she must have done wrong...'n' she is luckly 2 have her man slap her...but I say with our hausa chick (be isa bane kawai) It's gon' b kickboxing!!!  Eniwayz men, all u gotta du is pray 2 God 2 give u a good chick.

Anonymous

A woman should repsect her man and the husband should respect his wife. Apart from what religion say about womens conduct. We have to give it a negetive view. Lets take for instance. Social changes: Nowadays women fight back their husbands. When he speaks she speaks when he shouts she shouts. All this is accepted these day. Women raising their voices is seem as nothing these days, it is acceptable, it is the normal way for her to fight agaisnt her husband.

However, even though women are regarded to be very ill mannered towards their husbands these day. Men also should be brought out clearly in the picture. These days men are just doing unbeliveble things. Taking Abuja for instance. On a trip there, I learnt that these married men go out with other married women not belonging to them but to others. These married men are the onces taking young girls that will in the future be married to other men, taking them to hotels and being irresponsible. Men are also the same people who can make their own marriage life difficult. Harsh treatment to their wifes. Therefore if a woman beaves in such a bad way to her husband. If people are considerate enough, tey should also look in to the mans day to day behaviour to his wife. Don Hakanan mace baza ta fara ma mijinta rashin kunya ba with no genuine reason.

Fulanizzle

Salamu alaikum
Papi...........i salute u for sayin' what u said....
if a man doesnt respect himself....how in the world does he xpect his wife to respect him.........
that goes vice versa too......

much luv
)