Let me remember one song by ...it goes:
I dont care who you are..where you from...what you do..as long as you love me.
Do you seriously think the above singer is in his right senses ???
I ask this because I know a young man from Kano who is in love with a lady..a beautiful muslim girl from a tribe.
When he tell his parent about his intention to take her to alter ( or more properly to the munbar) they objected on the ground that she is not from a good background. (here they mean she is not a Hausa Fulani)
If I can put in Hausa they said "Ba ta da asali"
Please what is that ASALI ??? ???
Is it important in marriage that the girl or the man must have good geneology???
is it not visiting the sin of the ancestors on the offspring???
whatever ;D I think some pple must have fallen from the moon during thunderbolt. ;D ;D
Ppls reflect on Asali of the patner, so as to be able to judge upon the upbringing and training the patner has. However, where the patner was found to be of good manners, that nullify whatever his/her asali is.
If we refer to noble prophets time, the parent of some strong sahabas of prophet were not muslims such as Ali bin Abi Talib.
Some sahabas with concealed detail of genealogy like Salman Al-farisi, who if question...who is ur Dad or who is ur Mum, "AL-ISLAM" he replied.
If these sahabas were not judged upon their Asali rather their individual status, then, I see no reason we consider that today.......
However, the mercy of Islam passes across the barrier of racism and tribalism.....which today we all suffer from that....Fulani prefer to marry Fulani,,,,Hausa and Yoruba...all same.
Sai kaje ka auro iyam-iyam (mayya) then u know ASALI is important
hhhmmm i think its all depends...............but ka san mu hausawa we has this issue of arewa sai arewa...........i can remember my mum dont usually talk to me about aure but when i wa goin to uni she said to me too wallahi dan arewa dai ;) ;) ;) ;) ganin suke once ba dan arewa too ba asali
salam
question.......
if a guy is a convert...is it okay to marry him?
answer- yes it is. and the fact that u refuse marrying him becoz he a convert or because his mom and dad are non muslims...that idea is a capital HARAM!
think about this....he just converted....which makes him PURER than u.
think about this....me needs to even marry a strong muslim to help him and guide him thru his new faith.
think about this...he converted....which means he kindda have alot of advantages oevr you.
what advantages u may ask....okay. unl'ke U whoz a born Muslim....HE had to make researches...tonz and tonz of researches and made a lot of thinking and decision b4 converting.....soooooo he holds the religeon with MORE VALUE than u do.
ANOTHER QUESTION..... there 's a sweet and good girl u r seeing.u decide that u dont wanna marry her coz her father is a drunk....or coz her mother is a ********.... is it right u leave the girl?
ANSWER----HELLOOOOOOOOO !!!!! R U GONNA MARRY THE GIRL OR ARE U GONNA MARRY THE FATHER OR MOTHER? its not the girls fault that her parents r that way. if she has the magic...i strongly believe she will use it to fix her family up.
so why should the girl suffer for something she didnt do. as long as she is not like them....u can marry her and be a good influence on the family.
salam.....
This topic resemble the topic of Fulanicious but nevertheless, in marriage, one is supposed to comnsider ASALI as one of the factor to either give out or receive marriage.
I beleive no one among us will like to see his Son or Daughter, Brother or Sister marrying a person whom he don't know where he comes from.
Its not an abomination to do so, but what we fear is if a situation arises when he sells her property or just decide to run away?
So, I think knowing the origin of a person is a strong factor before one go into marriage.
YES, I AGREE IT IS GOOD TO CHECK ASALI, BUT THAT SHOULD'N T BE A FACTOR TO DISQALIFY A PERSON, IF HE PROVES TO BE OF GOOD MANNERS....
DO YOU FORGET THAT: ALLAH BRINGS FORTH A GOOD FROM BAD AND ALTERNATIVELY, BRINGS BAD FROM GOOD.
PROPHET IBRAHEEM WAS A PROPHET AND FRIEND OF ALLAH, BUT HIS FATHER WAS A PAGAN, SIMILARLY, THE 1ST MESSENGER OF ALLAH, PRPHET NUH, HAS A SON WHO WAS ALSO A PAGAN....
SO, WHAT ASALI HAS DO TO US AS MUSLIMS, IF WE ACCEPT MARRIAGE AS AN ACT OF IBADAT.
Salam all,
You ppl here are making alot of sense.
But then there is this issue of family values and home training which are very vital in guiding ones sense of justice. There is also the problem of gene which carries certain character traits over. When Ali the cousin of the Prophet sought to marry a second wife, who was a very beautiful woman and the daughter of his avowed enemy: Abu Jahal. The Prophet called Ali and told him that he was jealous for his own daughter Fatima, who was then married to Ali. The prophet complained seriously saying: How can a daughter of an avowed enemy of God share the same husband with the daughter of the God's own beloved?
I am not encouraging you ppl to be race or ethnic concious. But the truth of the matter is the behaviour of your partner has a far reaching impact on the behaviour of your children.
I have an uncle who till today regrets his marriage with his first wife. He says she spoiled all his children for him. He says if he were to do it afresh he would never look her way again. He says all these in maximum agony and grief.
And remember also, In Suratul Nur, we are adviced not marry KNOWN FORNICATORS and ADULTERERS if we know we are pure. What ever is the wisdom behind this devine injuction we do not know. But certainly Allah and His messenger always stress the importance of good values and in another verse, he says if you do good works even if they are not as good as those of your ancestors he would elevate you to the level of your ancestors.
So please create a chain of ppl who do good works as ancestors for your children. This will help them here in this and the world beyond.
What can someone say about (Auren mutu'a) ?
Do you think it's good or ?
You have forgotten to define what does Asali mean b4 getting in to discussing either is important or not.
to my understanding when ppl talk about Asali they mean who is her father or which family does she come from, and as long as your father is well known figure then you are alright.
But if she is from a poor family or another tribe then she is mara Asali Why??
QuoteYou have forgotten to define what does Asali mean b4 getting in to discussing either is important or not.
to my understanding when ppl talk about Asali they mean who is her father or which family does she come from, and as long as your father is well known figure then you are alright.
But if she is from a poor family or another tribe then she is mara Asali Why??
But, Ta-annabi, it appears like you missed the point. ASALI has nothing to do with a poor family or a rich one. But you can say it has everything to do with reputation. If your family has maintained a chain of producing good people over time or Vice-Versa, as I said earlier, family values and home training.
Hi
It is of old..but have this to say..
Asali to most Hausas means somebody who is not Hausa, Fulani or Kanuri of the tribes in Nigeria.
and just as Fulanicious pointed out I added: condemn a girl cos her father is not of good character and you are telling her to follow her father too. abi?
Honestly I cannot marry a woman who converted to Islam just to marry me or becouse she loves me...In case I died she may revert into kufr with some of my children may be.
But just a convert that I met and I happen to love why wont I marry her and her develop her faith..
I Dont know if my opinion is contrary to yours?????
our Parents think like that,but to my parents even hausa's don't have the "asali" u say.i'm shuwa arab,but i know whom to marry and whom not too,i look civilized but way back home i'm primitive. :(
to my parent they don't want their grandchild to be black cos they r not,i'm not but i still fall under the black race if categorise.my bro could'nt marry his girl cos she's hausa fulani,i know my status and limits and as long as i want to please them i have to obey.
but its not as bad as u might think but its all in my head since when i'm small,so i'm use to it and it has already affected my kind of taste fo girls.my girlfriend and wife to be she is from jigawa (a half cast),much lighter than i am.
so asali to u might be on other minorities but to other u don't even have asali.since hausawa did'nt get islam untill dan fodio,and i'm arabian(shuwa) and yemenise on the other hand,so to me u have no asali...
" tit for tat" :twisted:
Quote from: "Anonymous"What can someone say about (Auren mutu'a) ?
Do you think it's good or ?
GO TO IRAN . AND U WILL VE ALL THE STUFFS U WANT . YOP YO BOTTOM.
Quote from: "Eskimo"Honestly I cannot marry a woman who converted to Islam just to marry me or becouse she loves me...In case I died she may revert into kufr with some of my children may be.
But just a convert that I met and I happen to love why wont I marry her and her develop her faith..
I Dont know if my opinion is contrary to yours?????
(//%5Bimg%5D%5Bimg%5DAssalamu%20alaikum,%3Cbr%20/%3EMallam%20Eskimo%20i%20share%20your%20toughts%20about%20marrying%20of%20non-Muslims%20converts,%20who%20convert%20to%20marry%20a%20Muslim,%20such%20marriages%20have%20lots%20of%20disdavantages.%3Cbr%20/%3E%3Cbr%20/%3ELet%20me%20share%20with%20you%20a%20portion%20of%20a%20book%20titled%20'Courtship%20and%20Marraiage%20in%20lslam@%20on%20this%20matter........)[/img][/img]4.1 MARRIAGE BETWEEN MALE MUSLIM AND NON-MUSLIMS
A Muslim can marry slaves. It is also permissible to marry people of the book (Christian and Jewish women). Allah (SWT) says, " This day are (all) things good and pure made lawful unto you. The food of the people of The Book is lawful unto you and yours is lawful unto them. (Lawful unto you in marriage) Are (not only) chaste woman who are believers but chaste women among the people of the Book, Revealed before your time, when you give them their due dowers, and desire chastity, not lewdness, or secret intrigues. If any one rejects faith, Fruitless is his work, And in the hereafter he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (All spiritual good)." Q (5:5)
It is strongly recommended for men to be cautious when marrying a Christian or Jewish woman; the 'People of the Book'. Many of such marriages (nowadays) run into hitches. The solution to such problems may be for the husband to endeavour to teach the new convert, with patience, the knowledge of Islam and he should fear Allah (SWT) in the affair. This is in the event that she (the spouse) converts to Islam.
Many conditions are attached to the marriage to Ahl-Kitab, such as, Islam allows Muslim men to marry only chaste Christian or Jewish women, but such marriages should stem from a selection based on the chastity and moral uprightness of the woman. It is wrong for somebody to have an unlawful affair with a woman and after that immoral 'friendship' then decide to propose to the lady to convert to Islam, so that they can get married. In the first place such marriages are built on weak foundations, owing to the indecent relationship that has taken place. What should attract a Muslim to any woman should rather be her love for Islam, not the exotic curves, shape or size of her body or likewise. It is therefore imperative to understand that there is a huge difference between love and lust. Lust is, of course, an imaginary delusion or illusion induced by Satan. Lust has been described by a wise saying: The higher the temperature of lust rises; the deeper it is implanted into the heart of the lover and the further away the man becomes from reason.
The consequences in marrying non-Muslims can be disastrous, the repercussions tend to preclude their legality. However, it is not at all prohibited in Islam, but it is important to note the following: -
(i) The Holy Prophet (PBUH) did not marry a non-Muslims, though it was legal
(ii) The marriage may expose Muslims' secrets to un-believers through the wife,
(iii) There is no inheritance between a Muslim and non-Muslims,
(iv) The lady does not purify herself after intercourse by Ghusl Janaba,
(v) The intrusion of her family, who may also be un-believers may un-settle the couple,
(vi) The man (apparently) did not love the woman for the sake of Allah (SWT), since she is not a Muslim. And the Holy Prophet (PBUH) said, "There are three qualities (and) whoever posses them may taste the sweetness of faith. Firstly, one who loves Allah (SWT) and His Messenger (PBUH) above all, secondly, one who loves someone simply for the sake of Allah (SWT), and thirdly, one who abhors return to disbelief, after Allah (SWT) has rescued him from it, as he would abhor being thrown into the fire (the Hell)." 11
(vii) The wife may not dress islamically; may not wear Khimar and Hijab,
(viii) Her religion may not prohibit fornication and adultery,
(ix) The Muslim (man) had help in solving a social problem for the non-Muslims, with the growing number of unmarried Muslim ladies, why should a believer abandon these Muslim spinsters and marry a non-Muslim?
(x) In the event of the husband's death the woman may revert to disbelief taking back also the children into disbelief and shirk,
(xi) Another disadvantage is that if the love of the man is stronger, the woman may undermine his faith,
(xii) Such a marriage also causes friction between the man and his immediate family, who may object to the marriage because of their in-laws being unbelievers,
(xiii) There is the need for intensive teaching of the new converts, the knowledge of how to go about doing her Ibadat from scratch. Most people may not have the ability and the patience to do that satisfactorily, thus the lady may not get the necessary knowledge to perform her worship as expected,
(xiv) The Holy Prophet (PBUH) had cautioned us on the selection of wives because they would eventually be the trainers of our children and, moreover, offspring naturally inherit the characters of their parents especially mothers.
The Holy Prophet (PBUH) warned men to marry good mothers for their to be children. The children inherit such characters as intellect or lack of it, the good manners such as temperament, kindness, etc.