KanoOnline.com Forum

General => General Board => Topic started by: alhaji_aminu on August 26, 2008, 11:20:20 PM

Title: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: alhaji_aminu on August 26, 2008, 11:20:20 PM
Salam all,

And now, from a government of the people this:

***************
KNSG doles out 53 Jeeps to monarchs
Stories by ALIYU YUSUF (TRIUMPH)
KANO state government says it will continue to carry along traditional institutions in running the affairs of its people even if the country's constitution fails to define their roles.
This assertion was made by Governor Ibrahim Shekarau during the presentation ceremony of 53 Jeeps to 14 council members of Kano Emirate Council and 39 district heads in the state purchased at the cost of over N516 million. The occasion took place at the Government House, Kano.
The governor noted with satisfaction the various contributions being rendered by traditional rulers in the state especially in the areas of religion, security and reconciliation among the populace, saying this has coincided with government's Societal Re-orientation Programme.
Governor Shekarau who traced the history of Kano Emirate Council to pre-Jihad period of late Shehu Usman Ibn Fodio, and the coming of the British colonialists, explained that the dynamism of the modern society that entrenches a new democratic system of governance has limited the functions of the institutions.
He said even with the constitutional provisions inherent in the democratic system, Kano state government would continue to accord priority to the running of the affairs of Kano people, expressing appreciation to the emirate council for its support and good advice to his administration.
On the vehicles distributed, the governor said it was aimed at alleviating the transportation problems of the beneficiaries to enable them discharge their responsibilities more effectively.
He stressed that the state government purchased 14 out of the total number of the vehicles for the emirate council members, while those for the district heads were purchased by their local government councils.
In his remark, the Emir of Kano, Alhaji (Dr) Ado Bayero expressed gratitude to Governor Shekarau for his untiring support, assistance and cooperation to the emirate council.
He observed that for any representative assigned the responsibility to perform efficiently, his performance must be followed up in addition to the provision of the required facilities needed for such duties, saying the vehicles provided would no doubt assist them in the discharge of their services to the people.
The emir also expressed happiness over the new improved salary structure and allowances for traditional title-holders, in the state, adding that the development will also improve their respective performances.
He called on people in the state to join hands in prayers for continued peace and stability in the state and the country at large.
Earlier speaking, the state commissioner for local governments, Alhaji Salihu Sagir Takai,
had expressed satisfaction with the cordial relationship existing between the state government and the traditional institutions, saying the vehicles provided are aimed at facilitating the movement of the beneficiaries for better service delivery.
He disclosed that a new scheme of service has been introduced by his ministry as well as the improvement of salaries and allowances of traditional title-holders in the state.
Daily Triumph observed that the Jeeps jointly purchased by the state government and the local government councils are of different brands. They include Toyota Prado Jeeps for the district heads, Nissan Armada Jeeps, Mitsubishi Pajero Jeeps and Nissan Infinity Jeeps to the emirate council members and were distributed according to hierarchies.
****************

Need I say more..................Actually, I wish I was one of the awardees!

Allah ya gyara.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: HUSNAA on August 27, 2008, 07:14:38 AM
Allah Ya Isa!   >:(
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Rais on August 27, 2008, 01:16:24 PM
Fada da karfi  Auntyn Muhsin
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: alhaji_aminu on August 27, 2008, 03:23:23 PM
I have been on this forum for a while and I must say I have never seen HUSNAA utter something as strong as her response to the initial post. It truly is a shame that with the kind of poverty prevalent in Kano, the govt feels the best way to spend its Oil windfall is by getting SUV for our Royal Fathers. But then again, what do I know.

What is even more painful is the sheer number of vehicles bought, 53, at an exorbitant price. I mean, I myself import cars into Nigeria and I can tell you that unless the SUV is a newer model Lexus, Range Rover or Porsche then the =N= 10m spent on each is way too much.


I am afraid our dear Shekarau is fast derailing from the path of justice and fairness. First he promised water (which never flowed) and now he is spending our scarce resources in blinging out sarakuna.

Where does it end?
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Muhsin on August 27, 2008, 06:14:04 PM
The moment I heard of it, I exactly said the same expression uttered by Husnaa. And I here will say it again; Allah ya isa, kuma ya saka mana. This Shekarau's admin is likely gonna be the worst Kano ppl ever had. Allah ya kyauta! :o





























Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: gogannaka on August 28, 2008, 03:04:50 PM
Misplacement of priority.
I felt very sad when i heard it because the road to my house is in dire need of repair but because my local govt is PDP controlled the state govt neglects it.
The entire Sarkin Yaki road reconstruction is being done at N300 million while France road is at N700 million and you should see the work beng done,a great one.
I wonder how many roads would be built with N516 or how many surgical theaters would be constructed or how many indigenes would be sponsored to study in malaysia or how many schools would be renovated.
And kuma don't be surprised that the govt wiill still fuel and service the cars,another extra 100 million anually.
Allah ya yi masu jagora.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: bakangizo on August 28, 2008, 05:32:49 PM
Quote from: gogannaka on August 28, 2008, 03:04:50 PM
I felt very sad when i heard it because the road to my house is in dire need of repair but because my local govt is PDP controlled the state govt neglects it.

Maganin ku kenan. Me ya kaiku zabar feedeefee? ;D

Jokes aside, I agree that it doesn't have a nice ring to it. I mean, when you look at it, it isn't that calamitous. Much more money than that may have been wasted elsewhere, for other meaningless ventures, quitely without anybody being the wiser. What's distasteful is the timing, particularly when there are more pressing needs. You just don't do such "bonanzas" publicly in our dear, poverty-stricken society. So, the "royal fathers" may deserve it, but we the poor masses would certainly deem it a slap on our faces.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: HUSNAA on August 31, 2008, 08:09:52 AM
Quote from: Bakan~Gizo on August 28, 2008, 05:32:49 PM
So, the "royal fathers" may deserve it, but we the poor masses would certainly deem it a slap on our faces.

Why do they deserve it? What do they contribute economically to the society to make them worthies? To me its a case of kara wa mai karfi karfi that's all.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Dave_McEwan_Hill on August 31, 2008, 04:02:53 PM
One of my less pleasing memories of Kano was the disrespect, almost contempt, that many of the "ruling class" (no longer "ruling",ko?) felt for all the rest of their people.
This was not really deliberate. It was custom. It was traditional. It was the way they had been conditioned by society and position to think.
And it could only happen because the rest of their people consented to it.
I had many acquaintances among these persons and many of them were fine people. But it is true to say that they were much more respectful to strangers like me than they were to their own.

If this attitude changes, if the common people of the north are encouraged into serious education and encouraged to have high ambition (which is presently curbed by societal attitudes in the North ) and particularly if the North recognises the monumental agricultural potential of the Northern plains in a hungry world a better future could be secured.
But you may need help initially and you shouldn't worry over much where than comes from as long as it is efficient.
What astounded me latterly as a British (Scottish) educationalist in the North was the decision which was taken by successive governments - both State and national - to import technical and educational help from societies which were no more advanced and no more developed than Nigeria's.
I couldn't see any sense in that though I understand fully why that policy had a lot of appeal from a historical perspective.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: bakangizo on August 31, 2008, 05:52:19 PM
Quote from: HUSNAA on August 31, 2008, 08:09:52 AM
Quote from: Bakan~Gizo on August 28, 2008, 05:32:49 PM
So, the "royal fathers" may deserve it, but we the poor masses would certainly deem it a slap on our faces.

Why do they deserve it? What do they contribute economically to the society to make them worthies? To me its a case of kara wa mai karfi karfi that's all.

Easy. I said 'may' deserve it. I'm not defending it, as I mentioned the timing of the gift was wrong, given that the money could be used for the betterment of the state elsewhere. And no matter how you look it, they contribute one way or the other in the society. Contributions can come in different forms, not necessarily economic in nature.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Nuruddeen on August 31, 2008, 06:36:04 PM
Quote from: gogannaka on August 28, 2008, 03:04:50 PM
Misplacement of priority.
I felt very sad when i heard it because the road to my house is in dire need of repair but because my local govt is PDP controlled the state govt neglects it.
The entire Sarkin Yaki road reconstruction is being done at N300 million while France road is at N700 million and you should see the work beng done,a great one.
I wonder how many roads would be built with N516 or how many surgical theaters would be constructed or how many indigenes would be sponsored to study in malaysia or how many schools would be renovated.
And kuma don't be surprised that the govt wiill still fuel and service the cars,another extra 100 million anually.
Allah ya yi masu jagora.


Of course Gogannaka, this is sad indeed. I think Mallam is now derailing from his responsibilities. His government is hiding under God by making ppl see that they are really working. However, it is sad to see how Kano is turning into a sorry state. People are just camouflaging under Allah to seek refuge. I don't see any reason why one should use public money to buy luxurious cars for traditional rulers who always subjugate the down trodden.

May God guide Shekarau and his cronies aright.Ameen
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: HUSNAA on August 31, 2008, 07:45:55 PM
Quote from: Bakan~Gizo on August 31, 2008, 05:52:19 PM
Quote from: HUSNAA on August 31, 2008, 08:09:52 AM
Quote from: Bakan~Gizo on August 28, 2008, 05:32:49 PM
So, the "royal fathers" may deserve it, but we the poor masses would certainly deem it a slap on our faces.

Why do they deserve it? What do they contribute economically to the society to make them worthies? To me its a case of kara wa mai karfi karfi that's all.

Easy. I said 'may' deserve it. I'm not defending it, as I mentioned the timing of the gift was wrong, given that the money could be used for the betterment of the state elsewhere. And no matter how you look it, they contribute one way or the other in the society. Contributions can come in different forms, not necessarily economic in nature.

Lol, I'm easy; the vehemence is only on celuloid, BKG. I'm more frustrated than annoyed. Well since the royal fathers contribute in other ways which are not necessarily economic then they should be compensated in kind.


Quote from: Dave Hill on August 31, 2008, 05:52:19 PM
What astounded me latterly as a British (Scottish) educationalist in the North was the decision which was taken by successive governments - both State and national - to import technical and educational help from societies which were no more advanced and no more developed than Nigeria's.
I couldn't see any sense in that though I understand fully why that policy had a lot of appeal from a historical perspective.

Dave expand on this please. Sounds interesting and I want to know what policy this is and its appeal from a historical perspective. I guess u meant importing doctors and teachers from India (for example) in yesteryears ko?
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Dave_McEwan_Hill on August 31, 2008, 09:52:48 PM
In particular I remember the recruitment of masses of staff from the Philipines, many of whom could hardly talk English, some of whom appeared to have no appropriate qualification at all and some of whom were rumoured to be no more than karwai (is that the right word?) for the convenience of some senior Government figures. I remember a jockey who fell off a horse at Kano Racecourse lying in a corridor at Nasserawa Hospital with blood coming out one ear as I tried to get an Asian "surgeon" to intervene to save his life. He refused to operate. The jockey died. It turned out the qualification that particular surgeon had had been gained in India from book reading and his degree was so inferior that it prevented him from practising medicine in the UK. I took that case to Government House and the New Nigerian and Kano TV covered it. I remember and worked with some very good Asian staff as well it has to be said but some absolutely useless with extremely dubious qualification who seemed to be gaining employment by being recruited by some arrangement with officials and some "brothers" already in employment. It has to be said also that the emigration of qualified staff out of developing countries into better paid employment elsewhere damages the countries they have come from. In the few years before I left the employment of the Ministry of Education in Kano I watched the State pay very generous salaries to newly recruited foreign staff of very dubious quality. 
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: gogannaka on October 26, 2008, 05:15:23 PM
(http://www.guardiannewsngr.com/cartoons/cart01/261008)
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Muhsin on October 27, 2008, 03:29:33 PM
LOL...GGNK. A very good representation.  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: spoken20 on November 02, 2008, 02:01:44 PM
Very funny and enjoy it a lot. Very great presentation because it looks like reading funny comics and it is very nice so funny.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: gogannaka on November 03, 2008, 10:00:11 AM
Here's another joke you'll enjoy.

Fresh scandal: Reps: 7 cars for N400m is okay

The House of Representatives yesterday justified the purchase of exotic cars for its principal officers, saying there was nothing untoward about the purchase and that any aggrieved Member who wants to can petition the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) or any other anti-graft agency.


Rep Ita Enang (PDP, Akwa Ibom State) confirmed yesterday that there was a contract for the purchase of vehicles for Speaker Dimeji Bankole, Deputy Speaker Usman Bayero Nafada, House Leader Tunde Akogun and Chief Whip Emeka Ihidioha.

According to documents obtained by Daily Trust, the Body of Principal Officers of the House met on May, 2008 and approved the purchase of three Mercedes Benz (Treated) S-600 limousines at N52.8 million each for the Speaker and Deputy Speaker, totalling N158.4 million.

The contract with reference number NASS/HR/CHS/06/17/T and signed by Kabiru Suleiman for the Clerk of the House, was awarded through the National Assembly Management on the 30th June, 2008 to M/S Wadatau Global Company.

The  purchase of two Range Rovers (Treated) at N57.2 million each, amounting to N114.4 million for the Speaker and Deputy Speaker, and another Range Rover (Special) at N30 million for the Speaker and a Range Rover V8 for the House Leader at N27 million were also approved.

Investigations however showed that the contract awarded to M/S Wadatau Global Co. of IBB Way, Opposite Sani Abacha Stadium, 25, Zainab House, Kantin-Kwari, Kano was without competitive bidding. N83.875 being 25 percent part payment was made vide CBN cheque No. 00001922, 1923 and 1924 on 12th September 2008.

Also the Body of Principal Officers on 28th May, 2008 ratified the purchase of one unit of Toyota Lexus GX for the Chief Whip at N13.75 million. The ratification document had reference number NASS/3HR/CT3/13/3 and was also signed by Kabiru Suleiman for the Clerk of the House. The award letter was dated 25th June 2008, but the said vehicle had been supplied at N12.5 million on 16th December 2007.

Daily Trust found that the contractor, M/S KYMCO Motor Nigeria Limited does not exist in the books of the Corporate Affairs Commission, but  N13.75 million including 5 percent Tax and 5 percent VAT had been paid to him via CBN cheque 00001925. However, N1.375million being 5 percent VAT and Tax earlier included in the payment to M/S KYMCO was again paid directly to the FIRS vide CBN cheques 00001926 and 1927 on 12th September 2008.

But Enang, while justifying the purchase of the cars said, "First let us inform the general public that according to the Revenue and Fiscal Mobilisation Act, the President, Vice President, Senate President, Deputy Senate President, Speaker and the Deputy Speaker are to be provided with a stipulated number of vehicles in their convoy".   

He said that the Speaker is entitled to 8 cars in his convoy, as is the Deputy Speaker, adding that the vehicles are not private vehicles of the officers concerned but government property for any occupier of the office.

  He added, "Shortly after the election of the present leadership of the House in November 2007, there was a Security Memo which raised issues of security of Mr Speaker. The Memo in question raised fears about the safety of the inherited convoy vehicles which were in almost disused conditions. Repeatedly these vehicles have undergone repairs at the State House Mechanic Workshop in the last 8 months, thus the approval to purchase new convoy cars for the House's principal officers.   

The condition assumed alarming dimension when on two occasions during an official trip to Gombe, the Staff car of the Deputy Speaker broke down and had to be towed back to Abuja. Again, the Speaker of the House of Representatives had had to borrow vehicles from State Governments and friends whenever he visits Lagos or Ogun State on official trips and in order to get make up for the inadequacies.   

After so much embarrassment and inconveniences to the Number 4 citizen and his deputy, approval was given July 2008 for purchase of convoy vehicles. As I address you, the vehicles ordered for are yet to be delivered due to the fact that due process was being followed and the Speaker and his Deputy are still using the troublesome vehicles in question.   

Another question is whether the purchases were prudent or not given that they were legitimate. Let it be stated that the leadership of the House are at all times conscious of the need for financial discipline. Take the case of Mercedes Benz S.600 car (bullet proof) that is Treated; it cost N52.8 million because it was ordered directly from the manufacturer. The prevailing price of the same model in Nigeria from quotations submitted is between N82 to N105 million, so the House should rather be applauded for its prudence in saving over N25 million on the transactions. The same goes for other purchases that were transparently done.   

Indeed, these purchases were in the 2008 Budget which you know is a law. The cost of the cars purchased which are yet to be supplied were all purchased at prices below what is contained in 2008 Budget," he added.   

Enang also said that the House of Representatives is ready to face the anti graft agency and directed any aggrieved Member or member of the public to petition the EFCC or ICPC.

He said, "We are aware that powerful interests and groups are not happy in the recent oversight function of the House into various sectors and will fight back with all instruments at their disposal. But the leadership and members of the House are resolute about the legislature's role in the pursuit of good governance. There is no going back and all reactionary agents using subterfuge would be vehemently resisted while all anti-corruption agencies will receive every co-operation in getting to the root of any allegation," said Enang.

From Daily trust newspaper.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: HUSNAA on November 03, 2008, 04:34:58 PM
I dont mind that they should have cars. What I mind is that the cars should be bought at such exorbitant  unjustifiable prices. No government official is entitled to travel in a car costing more than 10 million naira.  Lokacin su Shagari and before them, ba peugeot  is the official car of govt ba? Why a mercedes benz? A mercedes benz is for luxurious cruising not for official purposes.
I shake head oooo. I have ran out of words. Lamarin sai dai addu'a kurum. Allah Ya Kyauta kuma Allah Ya Kwato ma talaka hakkin sa daga hannun azzaluman shugabanninan namu.
Ameen
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: gogannaka on November 07, 2008, 08:31:09 PM
Members of the House  of Representatives  Committee on Aviation were yesterday shocked in Kano when they were informed that only two radios and two computers are functioning in the control tower of Malam Aminu Kano Interna-tional Airport (MAKIA).

An officer in the control tower told the committee yesterday that virtually all facilities in the tower with exception of the two radios, two computers and one air conditioner were not servi-ceable.

"We are controlling aircraft with only experience. But as far as facilities are concerned, we don't have them here", he said. The official also informed the com-mittee that the facilities were ins-talled since 1957, saying virtually all the facilities need replacement.

Speaking to newsmen shortly after the visit, chairman of the committee, Mr. Bethal Nnaeme-ka Amadi, expressed concerned and shock over the dilapidation of Malam Aminu Kano Interna-tional Airport, saying it was qui-te unfortunate that the airport had been neglected for years despite the role it had played in the economic sector of the coun-try. He also said bureaucracy was part of the problems militating against the terminal project at MAKIA.

Bathel however said the lost glory of the airport must be res-tored, assured that the commit-tee would bring changes in the airport, as it would mount pres-sure on the MAKIA and NAMA managements about the project.

Earlier, the airport manager, Mr. Ali Nopk, intimated the com-mittee that MAKIA had pro-posed N2 billion for the overall restructuring of its international terminal, saying that lots of work would be executed with the money when approved.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: HUSNAA on November 07, 2008, 11:12:05 PM
Why am I not surprised by the news? Suma members of the House of Reps din ai munafukai ne. dukkansu sun san abinda ke faruwa. If us lay ppl know that Kano International is dysfunctional I wonder why they are all in awe at the news. They have known ever since all major international traffic was redirected to Lagos and Abuja.
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: EMTL on November 19, 2008, 04:52:09 PM
Quote from: Dave_McEwan_Hill on August 31, 2008, 04:02:53 PM
One of my less pleasing memories of Kano was the disrespect, almost contempt, that many of the "ruling class" (no longer "ruling",ko?) felt for all the rest of their people.
This was not really deliberate. It was custom. It was traditional. It was the way they had been conditioned by society and position to think.
And it could only happen because the rest of their people consented to it.
I had many acquaintances among these persons and many of them were fine people. But it is true to say that they were much more respectful to strangers like me than they were to their own.

Assalamu alaikum,
Did the Colonial masters contributed to the corrupting of our traditional institutions? I think YES Mr. Dave!!! Allah (SWT) Ya Isa da kisan gillar da akayi Sarakunanmu na Musulunchi aka gurbata mana Masarautu da suka amso tutoci da Shehu Usmanu (RL)
Title: Re: JOKE OF THE DAY............... ENJOY
Post by: Dave_McEwan_Hill on November 19, 2008, 07:21:31 PM
No excuse, EMTL.
The problem was just as much those Nigerians who were very keen to dance with the colonial masters.

These times are past. The point I was making was the fact that the traditional deference the common people in the North of Nigeria showed to their leaders, no matter whether the leaders deserved deference or respect or not, tended to hold the North back.