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Started by waduz, January 28, 2009, 11:01:29 AM

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This your story is very touching and I can see why every reasonable woman who thinks beyond her nose will have to think very seriously before getting married. And this kind of story sometimes gives young women reasons to marry  someone who already has a wife or wives for at least they will have an easy way assessing how he treats women. I think Waduz, who has been telling unpleasant stories of wives against husbands needs to comment on Ummita's revealing story.

As Hajiya Husnaa observed. The story reveals what happens everyday in many matrimonial homes. I don't want to judge people but many men you see who are selfish in their daily affairs tend to be very unfair husbands and the exigencies of daily living these days make many of us men to be that selfish.

Also there are those men who always want to dress themselves in religious cloaks. Their women suffer from very good dosage of maltreatment for the fact that the men enjoy immunity to public criticism by the length of their religious cloaks.

Then there is the class of "'yan iskan maza" who just don't care. I think sometimes when men are rich they are problematic also.

But whatever the case maybe there is a problem in our society that is very big and about to consume everybody if we do not take heed.

I think on my knowledge of what men are psychologically and socially including myself, I know a gentleman need a very loyal wife for him to be able to be a good husband to her. And she also needs a very loving husband for her to be loyal. But who acts first is what sometimes becomes the problem.

Again seriously speaking, I think Waduz needs to comment on Ummita's revealing and well rendered story. I have already printed it and will show my other friends here with whom we discuss women issues frequently.



kai kai kai nuruddeen, stay away from my daughter else your
proposed book launch will be sabotaged.  handle her with kia.

the issue of bazawara and bazawari is something worth discussing
and the tuzuru's tend to benefit the most from this discussion
as we are trying to identify and correct marrital problems that are
causing this unworthy transition.  saboda haka, nura should stop
blowing his trumphet, you might end up a bazawari.

"My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for" - Tupak


Well I have some very nasty side myself, but I think it wouldn't be out of place if we I tell Nuruddeen to apologize to the ladies in this discussion though I think it might be one of his weird jokes he was pulling, having known him personally.

But then Hajiya Husnaa, Ummita and Myself who is yet to surface, must not take this too seriously. Nuruddeen is not a very serious person with issues either.



Quote from: ummita on February 23, 2009, 03:00:10 AM
kai mallam do you really have a problem with me? Cus am guessing there's more to it than this thread. Have I ever paid you mind in this forum right from the onset? I know ppl I joke around and engage discussions with. Perhaps you taught this thread is ur chance to take a plunge at me for you seem so triggered and about to bust by my very simple comments. But best believe I aint hurt d slightest, just finding you amusing lol, lol .....try harder next time. And if u not interested why waste time in reading my story. DonAllah mallam kayi hakuri Amman bana a rashin kunya d shirme. Please no vex, jeka kayi kai kadai wallah. Even if u were 2 insult my parents, wont accomodate u wit a response. Banaso hayaniyah. Abeg carry go. Duk abunda ka fada naji nagode but will not even dignify ur comments wit a sound response. Though come to think of it lol lol lol da irin wannan attitude din ne ake tunanin yin auren? Such a drama king LOL. Abeg can we continue...... Infact am coming with another he and she story[\color]

Lala lala kika zage ni 'yar uwa? Me na miki har da zakiyi ta mini surutu barkatai. Baki san cewar ina "Pulling legs" din ki bane? Saura kuma kiyi mini muumunar fahimta saboda nace PULLING LEGS.

Kai jama'a ashe haka mata suke da daukan maganar da ake da wasa ta zama serious. Allah ya baku hakuri. Ke kuma Ummita kike ko Ummitameem? Zan sa kafar wando daya dake. Musamman ma idan kika kara shiga maganar da ba ruwanki, especially irin wadda kika sa kawarki ta sha duka.Lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mata iyayen giji. Uwanyen mu, kannenmu, yayyenmu da kakanninmu. Ta yaya za'a yi mu raina ku bayan ku kuka kawo mu Duniya.

Well, all things being said, THE BOY IS JUST KIDDING!!! HE DOESN'T MEAN WHAT HE SAID. IT'S JUST THAT HE'S A BONAFIDE "JOKER IN THE PARK". Legendary Waziri kaga yada ba'a fahimci tsokana ta ba ko? Lallai kam wannan shi ne kutufo da EMTL yake fada mana a bayya.

Husnaa, ni da ke we are still one and the same. Nobody can seperate us apart even Ummita not to talk of Myself. Ku dai kawai kun so kuyi mini Rubdugu amma na gane da wuri. Ummita ina Twinkle ta shiga ne? Da fatan dai zaki bani amsar inda ta tafi. Ki huce dan Allah. Most of the time what I say at chit chat is more or less for the sake of humour and humility. Period!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
o try and fail is atleast to learn. That will save one the inestimable loss of what might have been (positive or negative).


Hehehehehehehe!!!!! Nuruddeen, running away with his tail between his legs! Hahahahaha... waya ga ya ma! Gobe ma ka sake! Tukuna ma, in ji babarbare da aka ce masa wai makiyinsa ya mutu! Mata, ai ka barsu kawai!!!!!! ;D


Quote from: waduz on February 24, 2009, 09:03:16 AM
Hehehehehehehe!!!!! Nuruddeen, running away with his tail between his legs! Hahahahaha... waya ga ya ma! Gobe ma ka sake! Tukuna ma, in ji babarbare da aka ce masa wai makiyinsa ya mutu! Mata, ai ka barsu kawai!!!!!! ;D

I am sure Nuruddeen will learn to be very careful next time as I am glad to see that he has already apologized. It is a privilege that  all are here ready for us to interact with on the forums.

One rule that we must fully get internalized into our systems is to believe that the other person we are discussing or living with is a very important person even though not indispensable.

It is only then we can be good friends or spouses. But once we think we can take anybody for granted we run the risk of over stepping the boundaries of reason, respect and religion.

is a very good person and very capable of living above any shortcoming he may have so far manifested.

Anyway I am very terrible person too so if you want to try me ne Waduz I can bare my pangs on your fleshy neck! ;D ::) ??? Sai mu za ga koda bayan katangan Business Forum mu tube riga kowa ya ga  how I'll medicine you! ;D ::) :o :D



Kai Waziri, wa ya fada maka i have a fleshy neck?? Ai ni dan tsurut nake, kaman ruwa ya dauko rawani! Amma dai kam malam nuru ya fahimci komai. You see, my friend used to say that every morning he will greet his wife with these words, "Ranki ya dade uwargida, an tashi lafiya? Allah ya sa mu yini lafiya." Now here is an interesting encounter:

A mother sends her son to call his father, who was sitting outside with his friends. The father said okay, and went to meet his wife. He came out and sat with his friends when suddenly his son came for the second time to say he was wanted inside. The man said okay, and went and came back to sit with his friends, when the boy came again and told him, "baba, wai ka je in ji inna." He said okay and went into the house and came back to sit with his colleagues again, when the son came for fourh time to call him!

Father: (without thinking) Kai! ka je ka ce mata ban zuwa! Haba!

Son: To.

Father: Kai tsaya, bari ma na je da kaina na fada mata ban zuwa!

Why did the man changed his mind, and decided to answer the call cleverly.


Quote from: waduz on February 25, 2009, 10:45:21 AM
Why did the man changed his mind, and decided to answer the call cleverly.

;D lol, zaman lafiya mana.
"My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for" - Tupak


Quote from: Dan-Borno on February 25, 2009, 11:06:04 AM
Quote from: waduz on February 25, 2009, 10:45:21 AM
Why did the man changed his mind, and decided to answer the call cleverly.

;D lol, zaman lafiya mana.

Hausawa su ka ce ya fi zama dan Sarki!

But then while we are talking about the good things one can do to be a good husband or wife I'll hope that we also try to think of how we adress the general issue in our society.

I understand some of us like EMTL are against women demonstrating. While this is understandable I still can't see how we can help solve the problem of divorcees by just preaching or telling out that people should be nice to their partners.

I am wondering if others can easily think along side what I am thinking that perhaps if legislation can be promulgated that look deeper into the affairs of married couples.

I am saying this having the story told by Ummita up there in mind knowing fully how rampant cases as that happen in our society to our sisters, mothers and daughters( Yes I mean it our own cos I come from an extended family, we number about 1994, I am a stake holder, NOT stick holder Waduz ;D ::) ).

Now do we simply tell those our women who have been battered and sent packing to go back and do HAKURI? That's assuming the man is ready to take them back.

Ok. Since EMTL is suggesting that k-online - considering our resolutions after the annual meeting - should create some pamphlets counseling married couples, why shan't we then make it a point of duty to stress clearly, in the pamphlets bearing k-online tag, that our position is the government must act and come up with well articulated legislation that ensures a cover for a divorced woman? Remember according to Ummita's story nothing was done to that man in the light of law.

If we can produce about 50,000 pamphlets and share them across northern Nigeria, I think it will serve two purposes, we will keep our women at home without allowing them out on demonstration and  send a powerful protest to the government that it must act to save our society from profaning its most sacred heritage, institution of marriage.



Mallam Waziri, that is a very sensible and mature suggestion. I endorse it. If mature and responsible men come out in support of a safeguard for women, then the irresponsible men will have nothing to do but shut up or get shot down.
Ghafurallahi lana wa lakum


very impressive presentation from the legendary master of kline.
just like auntyn muhsin (ina yake ne for god sake?) i also support
this motion.  I am sure we can come up with something sensible
to our various state's houses of assembly.

in view of this, i hereby make the following recommendation for
the committee to commence work immediately:-

1.  Ummita to serve as chairperson of the committee
2.  Nura Jibo - member
3.  Bee  -  Member
4.  Bakangizo - Member
5.  IBB - member
6.  Waduz - member
7.  Waziri & Muhsin should serve as Secretary & Co-Secretary respectively

a.  to identify the immediate and remotre cause(s) of divorce in arewa
b.  profer solution to (a) above
c.  prepare a suitable document for presentation to all the northern states houses of assembly
    with a view of enacting a law that will reduce high rate of divorce (bazawara/bazawari) in arewa
d.  make other further recommendations as with regards to family life in arewa

You are hereby given up to July 31st, 2009 to submit your report for further action, please.

"My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for" - Tupak


Dan Borno be serious, and shut the lower half face of yr avatar >:(
Ghafurallahi lana wa lakum


Danborno, wa ya sa ka? How can you, with all seriousness, just nominate ONLY one female in the committee? Haven,t you ever heard of gender equality? Or what a man can do a woman can do even better? You better reposition yourself for the inpending upper and lower cuts to defend your little but wide avarter mouth! ;D ;D ;D Without any consultations with the guru maharajis of KOL before coming up with your list, I cannot see this committee going any where. Kai Malam, da sakel!


ni na sa kaina, since no one is willing to offer his service  ;)

Bee is a female member of this forum, except if you want
me to add their president jamiyyan matan arewa lol.

the committee list stands
"My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for" - Tupak

Sani Danbaffa

Haba mana DB, ai qoqari a qara wata mana ko kuma a tabbatar da masu experience a cikin harkar mana. In aka samu zawarawa da wadanda suka taba sakin matan su wata qila za a dace su ba da shawara mai kyau a kan ilimin su da suka samu a cikin harkar. Mu dai muna son ganin qarshen lamarin ne. Allah ba da sa'a.
Seek knowledge to be usefull to the society, help and spread happiness.