Men and Women in chatrooms

[bamalli]

Question :

I am a sister, who usually logs in to Yahoo and then goes to the Islamic rooms so that I may gain some knowledge related to our religion. Sometimes while I am in one of those Islamic rooms in Yahoo,a muslim brother(looking for a wife) in the room asks me to have a private written chat with him so that we get to know one another. Some of the questions he asks me are: where i live, my age, whether i am married(by the way I am not married), if I am planning to get marry, whether I live with my parents, and so on. My problem is, I don't know whether I am allowed(Islamicly) to give non-muharim brother those kinds of informations which related to me.
Is it really SIN to talk to a brother in writing ??.


Answer :

Praise be to Allaah.

There is nothing wrong with a Muslim woman making use of the internet and entering the Yahoo website for that purpose, so long as that does not lead to anything that is forbidden in Islam, such as talking privately with men. That is because talking to men may turn into chat which usually leads temptation. Hence it is essential to be strict and avoid that, seeking the pleasure of Allaah and fearing His punishment.

How often have these conversations lead to bad results, and even caused people to fall in love, and have led some to do things that are even more serious than that. The Shaytaan makes each of them imagine attractive qualities in other, which leads them to develop an attachment that detrimental to their spiritual welfare and worldly affairs.

Sharee?ah blocks all the ways that may lead to fitnah (temptation, trial), hence it forbids softness of speech and does not allow a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman. Undoubtedly these private chats are not regarded as khulwah in the sense that he people involved cannot see one another, but they are one of the greatest causes of fitnah as is well known.

What has happened to you is the best testimonial to the truth of what we are saying, because it is difficult for a man to ask these personal questions of a believing woman, unless he uses these means that are being used in a bad way.

Fear Allaah, and do not speak to non-mahram men. This is safer for your religious commitment and purer for your heart. You should note that marriage to a righteous man is a blessing from Allaah, and a blessing cannot be acquired by means of sin.

Shaykh Ibn Jibreen (may Allaah preserve him) was asked: What is the ruling on correspondence between young men and women, if this correspondence is free from immorality and love?

He replied:

It is not permissible for any man to correspond with a woman who is not his mahram, because of the fitnah (temptation) involved in that. A person may think that there is no fitnah, but the Shaytaan will keep trying until he tempts him. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded those who heard of the Dajjaal to keep away from him, and said that a man may approach him as a believer, but the Dajjaal will keep trying until he leads him astray.

Correspondence between young men and women involves a great deal of fitnah and danger, so we must avoid it, even though the questioner says that this correspondence is free from immorality and love.

From Fataawa al-Mar?ah, compiled by Muhammad al-Musnad, p. 96.

Undoubtedly correspondence via chat rooms is more dangerous than correspondence by mail, but both are bad.

And Allaah knows best.

[ummita]

Answer :
How often have these conversations lead to bad results, and even caused people to fall in love,

Developing fondness or likes leads 2 bad result? Is it? I taught it was more 2 do wit jumping d broom, the procreation of children & 4 us women 2 open hanyan na arziki 4 men ?....

Sharee?ah blocks all the ways that may lead to fitnah (temptation, trial), hence it forbids softness of speech and does not allow a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman.

Oh Allah nah! So much not known, I taught a womans voice is also her Al'auraht.....& therefore a decree was passed 4 a woman 2 speak soft-toned. Quite interestingly, amongst d merits of Khadijah bint Khuwaylid was how soft spoken she was not only to her husband Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W), she was known to be soft spoken 2 her co-mates: Aisha Siddiqa bint Abu Bakr, Hafsa bit Umar, Zayna, Umma Salama, Maimuna, Habiba, Maria and Juwayriya who have all been reportedly or references were made in Hadiths about the way they talk: calm & soft! However, I learnt under Shariah rules that a woman should not speak in a seductive manner, which quite rightly could lead 2 all sorts but she is allowed to speak in a soft & low keyed manner. Moreover, ranting on top of her lungs is mannerless & not very lady-like. From further teachings, I also learnt & very trully that a woman is not to associate wit any1 who is nt her muharram........but there are xceptions on that stand! Otherwise, what considerations are we to imply on doctor/patient relationship, student/lecturer or working in an environment where male & female communication is ineviatable?

It is not permissible for any man to correspond with a woman who is not his mahram, because of the fitnah (temptation) involved in that. Correspondence between young men and women involves a great deal of fitnah and danger, so we must avoid it, even though the questioner says that this correspondence is free from immorality and love.

La Haula lakuwatah Inna Billah.............so hypothetically, d likes of "us" in dis forum are.....? And I keep hearing about: "I met him" & "he met me", via this halal muslim website "den we had an islamic wedding".........what about that?

Undoubtedly correspondence via chat rooms is more dangerous than correspondence by mail, but both are bad..

Thank God.....I dont do chats............ina kuke? kunji abun de aka fada ko! So start erasing ur messeger providers!

Pardon me, but am finding some underlying principles here 2 b vague....making it hard 4 me 2 understand.
Toh, may Allah guide us more.

[bamalli]

Answer :
How often have these conversations lead to bad results, and even caused people to fall in love,

Developing fondness or likes leads 2 bad result? Is it? I taught it was more 2 do wit jumping d broom, the procreation of children & 4 us women 2 open hanyan na arziki 4 men ?....

Sharee?ah blocks all the ways that may lead to fitnah (temptation, trial), hence it forbids softness of speech and does not allow a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman.

Oh Allah nah! So much not known, I taught a womans voice is also her Al'auraht.....& therefore a decree was passed 4 a woman 2 speak soft-toned. Quite interestingly, amongst d merits of Khadijah bint Khuwaylid was how soft spoken she was not only to her husband Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W), she was known to be soft spoken 2 her co-mates: Aisha Siddiqa bint Abu Bakr, Hafsa bit Umar, Zayna, Umma Salama, Maimuna, Habiba, Maria and Juwayriya who have all been reportedly or references were made in Hadiths about the way they talk: calm & soft! However, I learnt under Shariah rules that a woman should not speak in a seductive manner, which quite rightly could lead 2 all sorts but she is allowed to speak in a soft & low keyed manner. Moreover, ranting on top of her lungs is mannerless & not very lady-like. From further teachings, I also learnt & very trully that a woman is not to associate wit any1 who is nt her muharram........but there are xceptions on that stand! Otherwise, what considerations are we to imply on doctor/patient relationship, student/lecturer or working in an environment where male & female communication is ineviatable?

It is not permissible for any man to correspond with a woman who is not his mahram, because of the fitnah (temptation) involved in that. Correspondence between young men and women involves a great deal of fitnah and danger, so we must avoid it, even though the questioner says that this correspondence is free from immorality and love.

La Haula lakuwatah Inna Billah.............so hypothetically, d likes of "us" in dis forum are.....? And I keep hearing about: "I met him" & "he met me", via this halal muslim website "den we had an islamic wedding".........what about that?

Undoubtedly correspondence via chat rooms is more dangerous than correspondence by mail, but both are bad..

Thank God.....I dont do chats............ina kuke? kunji abun de aka fada ko! So start erasing ur messeger providers!

Pardon me, but am finding some underlying principles here 2 b vague....making it hard 4 me 2 understand.
Toh, may Allah guide us more.

Please b4 you comment read more from this book:
Fataawa al-Mar?ah, compiled by Muhammad al-Musnad, p. 96.

[hayat]

Rasullulah (SAW) did not marry anyone else when Khadijah bint Khuwaylid (RA) was alive, so she didnot have any co-mates. Only after her death did he practise polygyny.
Regarding softness of the voice:
 Surah Al-Ahzaab
32:O wives of the Prophet! You are not like any other women. If you keep your duty (to Allah), then be not soft in speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease (of hypocrisy, or evil desire for adultery, etc.) should be moved with desire, but speak in an honourable manner.
Hope this helps.

[HUSNAA]

Does posting threads and engaging in discussions qualify as chatting. Taking into account that the exchanges may not be in real time? I write. Someone responds ten hrs later.......

[alkanawi]

technically speaking i dont think e-chatting  is = normal conversation even if it is real time.Just as you can not have a silent conversation because sound or voice is needed, e-chatting is missing the key ingredient for conversation, namely voice.
Also it serves the requirement of min wara'il hujrati all we need do is try and keep to the commandments of Suraat Ahzab v.32 as posted by Hayat.
Wa ma taufeeq illa biLLAH

[Hafsy_Lady]

Its either right or wrong. Can someone just get to the point? What is the correct stand?
Ma-assalam

[alkanawi]

nah
there are certain grey areas as attested to by the hadith "innal halala bayinnun...................wa bayna huma umurun mushtabihat" au kama qala rasulullah.
Islamic jurists are wary of pronouncing something as either halal or haram if it has not being explicitly termed so from the sources i.e Qur'an and Sunnah or such ruling could be derived absolutely from such sources.Their fear/caution derives from arrogating to themselves what is the exclusive preserve of Allah S.W.T and there by following the foot steps of the Yahud whom their Rabbis declare what is halal or haram for them out of their own whims,as explained by the Prophet S.A.W while explaining verse 9:31 to Adi bin Hatim.

Notice carefully how the two jurists did not expressly "haramised" or "halalised" the matter but gave their understanding of their issue as well as advised on avoidance(balle mu da ban mu san komai ba) .This gave rise to terms like "makruh","mustahabb" etc by the fuqaha.

WaLLAHU a'alam.