Author Topic: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?  (Read 5337 times)

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Offline Eskimo

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Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« on: March 22, 2004, 01:08:45 PM »
Let me remember one song by ...it goes:
I dont care who you are..where you from...what you do..as long as you love me.

Do you seriously think the above singer is in his right senses ???

I ask this because I know a young man from Kano who is in love with a lady..a beautiful muslim girl from a tribe.

When he tell his parent about his intention to take her to alter ( or more properly to the munbar) they objected on the ground that she is not from a good background. (here they mean she is not a Hausa Fulani)

If I can put in Hausa they said "Ba ta da asali"

Please what is that ASALI ??? ???
Is it important in marriage that the girl or the man must have good geneology???

is it not visiting the sin of the ancestors on the offspring???

whatever ;D I think some pple must have fallen from the moon during thunderbolt. ;D ;D
color=blue]NOBODY is PERFECT and I am NOBODY.[/color]

Offline alimsuf

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #1 on: March 24, 2004, 01:34:53 PM »
Ppls reflect on Asali of the patner, so as to be able to judge upon the upbringing and training the patner has. However, where the patner was found to be of good manners, that nullify whatever his/her asali is.

If we refer to noble prophets time, the parent of some strong sahabas of prophet were not muslims such as Ali bin Abi Talib.

Some sahabas with concealed detail of genealogy like Salman Al-farisi, who if question...who is ur Dad or who is ur Mum, "AL-ISLAM" he replied.

If these sahabas were not judged upon their Asali rather their individual status, then, I see no reason we consider that today.......

However, the mercy of Islam passes across the barrier of racism and tribalism.....which today we all suffer from that....Fulani prefer to marry Fulani,,,,Hausa and Yoruba...all same.

Offline IBB

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #2 on: March 24, 2004, 03:00:32 PM »
Sai kaje ka auro iyam-iyam (mayya) then u know ASALI is important
IHS

Anonymous

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #3 on: March 24, 2004, 03:17:54 PM »
hhhmmm i think its all depends...............but ka san mu hausawa we has this issue of arewa sai arewa...........i can remember my mum dont usually talk to me about aure but when i wa goin to uni she said to me too wallahi dan arewa dai ;) ;) ;) ;) ganin suke once ba dan arewa too ba asali

Offline Fulanizzle

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #4 on: March 25, 2004, 01:35:04 PM »
salam

question.......

if a guy is a convert...is it okay to marry him?

answer-  yes it is. and the fact that u refuse marrying him becoz he a convert or because his mom and dad are non muslims...that idea is a capital HARAM!

think about this....he just converted....which makes him PURER than u.
think about this....me needs to even marry a strong muslim to help him and guide him thru his new faith.
think about this...he converted....which means he kindda have alot of advantages oevr you.

what advantages u may ask....okay. unl'ke U whoz a born Muslim....HE had to make researches...tonz and tonz of researches and made a lot of thinking and decision b4 converting.....soooooo he holds the religeon with MORE VALUE than u do.
)

Offline Fulanizzle

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #5 on: March 25, 2004, 01:40:21 PM »
ANOTHER  QUESTION..... there 's a sweet and good girl u  r seeing.u decide that u dont wanna marry her coz her father is a  drunk....or coz her mother is a ********.... is it right u leave the girl?

ANSWER----HELLOOOOOOOOO !!!!!  R U GONNA MARRY THE GIRL  OR ARE U GONNA MARRY THE FATHER OR MOTHER?  its not the girls fault that her parents r that way. if she has the magic...i strongly believe she will use it to fix her family up.

so why should the girl suffer for something she didnt do. as long as she is not like them....u can marry her and be a good influence on the family.

salam.....
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Offline Hausanicious

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #6 on: March 25, 2004, 04:17:04 PM »
This topic resemble the topic of Fulanicious but nevertheless, in marriage, one is supposed to comnsider ASALI as one of the factor to either give out or receive marriage.

I beleive no one among us will like to see his Son or Daughter, Brother or Sister marrying a person whom he don't know where he comes from.

Its not an abomination to do so, but what we fear is if a situation arises when he sells her property or just decide to run away?

So, I think knowing the origin of a person is a strong factor before one go into marriage.
Say no Evil and Do no Evil unto Me,   Kunji Ko!

Offline alimsuf

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #7 on: March 25, 2004, 10:22:36 PM »
YES, I AGREE IT IS GOOD TO CHECK ASALI, BUT THAT SHOULD'N T BE A FACTOR TO DISQALIFY A PERSON, IF HE PROVES TO BE OF GOOD MANNERS....

DO YOU FORGET THAT: ALLAH BRINGS FORTH A GOOD FROM BAD AND ALTERNATIVELY, BRINGS BAD FROM GOOD.

PROPHET IBRAHEEM WAS A PROPHET AND FRIEND OF ALLAH, BUT HIS FATHER WAS A PAGAN, SIMILARLY, THE 1ST MESSENGER OF ALLAH, PRPHET NUH, HAS A SON WHO WAS ALSO A PAGAN....

SO, WHAT ASALI HAS DO TO US AS MUSLIMS, IF WE ACCEPT MARRIAGE AS AN ACT OF IBADAT.

Offline Waziri

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #8 on: March 26, 2004, 12:56:48 PM »
Salam all,

You ppl here are making alot of sense.

 But then there is this issue of family values and home training which are very vital in guiding ones sense of justice. There is also the problem of gene which carries certain character traits over. When Ali the cousin of the Prophet sought to marry a second wife, who was a very beautiful woman and the daughter of his avowed enemy: Abu Jahal. The Prophet called Ali and told him that he was jealous for his own daughter Fatima, who was then married to Ali. The prophet complained seriously saying: How can a daughter of an avowed enemy of God share the same husband with the daughter of the God's own beloved?

I am not encouraging you ppl to be race or ethnic concious. But the truth of the matter is the behaviour of your partner has a far reaching impact on the behaviour of your children.

I have an uncle who till today regrets his marriage with his first wife. He says she spoiled all his children for him. He says if he were to do it afresh he would never look her way again. He says all these in maximum agony and grief.

And remember also, In Suratul Nur, we are adviced not marry KNOWN  FORNICATORS and ADULTERERS if we know we are pure. What ever is the wisdom behind this devine injuction we do not know. But certainly Allah and His messenger always stress the importance of good values and in another verse, he says if you do good works even if they are not as good as those of your ancestors he would elevate you to the level of your ancestors.

So please create a chain of ppl who do good works as ancestors for your children. This will help them here in this and the world beyond.

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #9 on: March 28, 2004, 12:52:44 AM »
What can someone say about (Auren mutu'a) ?

Do you think it's good or ?

Offline Ta-Annabi

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #10 on: March 28, 2004, 01:18:54 AM »
You have forgotten to define what does Asali mean b4 getting in to discussing either is important or not.
to my understanding when ppl talk about Asali they mean who is her father or which family does she come from, and as long as your father is well known figure then you are alright.
But if she is from a poor family or another tribe then she is mara Asali Why??
b]INNA LILLAHI WA'INNA ILAIHIL RAJU'UN[/b]

Offline Waziri

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Re: Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #11 on: March 29, 2004, 11:34:13 AM »
Quote
You have forgotten to define what does Asali mean b4 getting in to discussing either is important or not.
to my understanding when ppl talk about Asali they mean who is her father or which family does she come from, and as long as your father is well known figure then you are alright.
But if she is from a poor family or another tribe then she is mara Asali Why??

But, Ta-annabi, it appears like you missed the point. ASALI has nothing to do with a poor family or a rich one. But you can say it has everything to do with reputation. If your family has maintained a chain of producing good people over time or Vice-Versa, as I said earlier, family values and home training.

Offline Eskimo

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Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #12 on: April 22, 2004, 08:04:58 PM »
Hi
It is of old..but have this to say..

Asali to most Hausas means somebody who is not Hausa, Fulani or Kanuri of the tribes in Nigeria.

and just as Fulanicious pointed out I added: condemn a girl cos her father is not of good character and you are telling her to follow her father too. abi?
color=blue]NOBODY is PERFECT and I am NOBODY.[/color]

Offline Eskimo

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Is ASALI an Important Issue in Marriage?
« Reply #13 on: April 22, 2004, 08:09:59 PM »
Honestly I cannot marry a woman who converted to Islam just to marry me or becouse she loves me...In case I died she may revert into kufr with some of my children may be.

But just a convert that I met and I happen to love why wont I marry her and her develop her faith..

I Dont know if my opinion is contrary to yours?????
color=blue]NOBODY is PERFECT and I am NOBODY.[/color]

Offline ali_grema

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ur right 4rm a point!!!
« Reply #14 on: April 27, 2004, 08:31:52 PM »
our Parents think like that,but to my parents even hausa's don't have the "asali" u say.i'm shuwa arab,but i know whom to marry and whom not too,i look civilized but way back home i'm primitive. :(
 to my parent they don't want their grandchild to be black cos they r not,i'm not but i still fall under the black race if categorise.my bro could'nt marry his girl cos she's hausa fulani,i know my status and limits and as long as i want to please them i have to obey.
    but its not as bad as u might think but its all in my head since when i'm small,so i'm use to it and it has already affected my kind of taste fo girls.my girlfriend and wife to be she is from jigawa (a half cast),much lighter than i am.
   so asali to u might be on other minorities but to other u don't even have asali.since hausawa did'nt get islam untill dan fodio,and i'm arabian(shuwa) and yemenise on the other hand,so to me u have no asali...
          "   tit for tat" :twisted:
   

 


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