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[Anonymous]

Hi Everyone, I just need to hear what people have to say about what I'm about to say.


I was Born in the States and live in Nigeria for about 10yrs of my life then move back to the states and continue on my life. I am in my mid 20's right now graduated from college and have a stable responsible job in the US.

My parents have told me what to do through out my life I was raised in the states with Nigerian/Hausa mindset... I speak and understand hausa.. I'm also a devoted muslim. I know you guys will say okay what's my point, this is my point... my parents now are forcing me to go to nigeria and do NYSC and then come back. I asked them what good it will do to me still no comment, the only thing I get back from them was because that's what I want. I was asked to quit my job and packed up and go to nigeria... which I think is not fair it's my life at least I should have a say in it. I tried everything I begged them to see this thing through rationally but it just look like they are not even trying to think. It's what I want you to do and you should do it.

to tell you the truth as of right now I hate the culture, I don't even want to be associated with it. at one point I thought that the religion of islam indicate that human have free will but I was told is not up to me is up to what my parents wants. I love my parents don't get me wrong, but I'm so unhappy and miserable inside, that I don't even think I will achieve what they want me to achieve in Nigeria. one of the thing I know is that I think they just want me to go to Nigeria so I can find a partner my type(Nigerian/Hausa) but should I stopped my life completely just to go on a journey that I don't want to do? what will happen to me after the NYSC? well according to them, well you can come back and look for another job.

People I don't know what to do. I think being raised outside nigeria parents tends to be extreme about the culture and traditions that I don't think it's being practised today. but they keep saying it's our CULTURE it's our TRADITIONS.

please advise me on what road to take..

[dan kauye]

woah!

[dan kauye]

well,culture means a hell lot 2 nigerians particularly d hausas,who knows? mayb ur parents feel u need 2 know ur roots very well,mayb they think u need more islamic orientation,so many maybe(s).in as much as i wudnt buy d idea of coming 2 naija i think it'll be betta if u do wut ur parents want coz parents alweiz want d best 4 dere children n ofcourse dey olweiz know betta.peace ya!

[Hafsy_Lady]

JUST FOLLOW YOUR HEART. I BELIEVE IF YOU HAVE THE RIGHT STATE OF MIND AND AS AN ADULT YOU CAN MAKE YOUR OWN DECISIONS BUT YOU SHOULD BEAR IN MIND HOW YOUR PARENTS WILL TAKE IT. PARENTS COUNT A GREAT DEAL. TRY TALKING TO THEM, TELL THEM YOUR MIND AM SURE THEY WILL UNDERSTAND BECAUSE PARENTS UNDERSTAND THE MINDS OF THEIR CHILDREN AND THEY ARE FOREVER READY TO MAKE SACRIFICES IF IT WILL PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE. DO NOT TAKE IT ALL HARSH & HOT WITH THEM.
BUT HEY ITS A SHAME THAT YOU HATE YOUR CULTURE NOW. YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF YOUR HERITAGE! YOUR CULTURE IS NOT THE CAUSE OF YOUR DISSAPOINTMENT BUT THE REAL CAUSE IS THAT, YOU ARE JUST UPSET BECAUSE OF THE DECISIONS YOUR PARENTS MADE WHICH COULD WELL BE RESOLVED. THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH CULTURE AND TRADITION ITS JUST SOMETHING TO DO BEWTEEN YOUR PARENTS AND YOU BUT ALL THE SAME WISH YOU GOOD LUCK

mmmh heard a similar story this about some gul

[Fulanizzle]

SALAM

OH BRO.....ITS JUST THE WAY IT IS...LOL I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND .....U KNOW RIGHT NOW I AM KINDDA GOING THRU THE SAME STUFF......I WANNA DO MY SECOND I.T  IN AUSTRALIA OR  JAPAN. MY PARENTS R KOOL THOUGH...THEY LET ME DO MAH FIRST ONE IN GERMANY. BUT NOW MY FAM BOTH  ON MY MOMZ N POPZ SIDE R MAKING A HUUUUUUUUGE BIG DEAL THAT I HAVE TO GO NIJA FOR MY SECOND INDUSTRIAL ATTACHMENT.....AND  MY PARENTS KINNDA BOUGHT THE IDEA TOO.....WHICH AT THE MOMENT I AM ACTUALLY THINKING OF  CANCELLIN MY IT THIS YEAR FOR NEXT YEAR..... ANYWAYS....I KINNDA SUSPECT THAT MY  UNCLES ETC WANT TO HOOK ME UP WIT A NIGERIAN....(WELL NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH IT..) TIMES B4 THEY SPUN A LOT OF WEBS AND WAITED FOR ME TO FLY INTO IT. BUT ALLAH IS SO GRACIOUS TO ME!!! BUT PEOPLE SHOULD REALIZE THAT IT IS U AND ONLY U THAT GETS TO STAY WITH UR PARTNER NOT THEM.....SO THEY SHOULD LAY LOW AND LET THINGS FUEL UP NATURALLY.  
AS FOR U...IF U HAVE SOMEONE OVA THERE ALREADY, TALK TO UR FOLX  BOUT HER. AND IF THINGS GET MORE COMPLICATED, IT NEVER HURTS TO PRAY OVA IT.... OH ONE MORE THING....WHAT EVER U SAY TO UR PARENTS ABOUT IT...EVEN IF THEY MISUNDERSTAND YOU, PLEASE DONT SAY HARSH WORDS OR BE RUDE...JUST DONT DO ANYTHING THAT WILL HURT THEIR FEELINGS....AFTER ALL IN MOST CASES IF PEOPLE DO WHAT THEIR PARENTS OR ELDERS WANT, THEY NEVER SEE DESPAIR. AND DONT FORGET THEY LOVE U...IF THEY KNOW U WAS GOIN TO GET HURT, THEY WONT EVEN SUGGEST U DO NYSC.

PS.....PLUS ITS NOT LIKE THEY GONNA PICK UP A GLUE AND STICK A GIRL ON U....LOL IF U DIDNT SEE WHO U LIKE, THATS THAT. JUST DO UR THANG!

[Nuruddeen]

You see, whenever matters turn out to be like this, one needs to weigh things and judge fairly by him or herself. Human beings by nature are capable of making their own decisions. Bye