Author Topic: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.  (Read 28300 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Bee

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Join Date: Oct 2007
  • Posts: 163
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« on: December 17, 2007, 11:14:23 AM »
Give us a good laugh by telling us your true-life naughty secrete.Tell us that naughty thing you have done today! In return, we will support you all the way, give you an advice where necessary or we could simply laught with you!!!  ;D ;D ;D
Born To Bee Great

Offline Muhsin

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jul 2006
  • Location: kano
  • Posts: 3107
  • Gender: Male
  • Ikraa bismi Rabbikal lazii khalaq
    • View Profile
    • The Learner
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #1 on: December 17, 2007, 11:47:02 AM »
Ah Miss Bee, what a nice thread. Hope it'll make lots members laugh when they heard what others have had done in a day. Okay, let me firstly start by telling what...

I today visited a website called facebook.com for they first time looking for a pic of our Bee as she said her pic is fixed there. Lol ;DWhat a coincident after long search which ended in vain come back here and reach this thread and... :D


Get to know [and remember] Allah in prosperity & He will know  [and remember] you in adversity.

Offline Bee

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Join Date: Oct 2007
  • Posts: 163
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #2 on: December 17, 2007, 12:05:03 PM »
     I woke up early today as usual and got ready for work.I needed to get some cash for my journey so i walk to a cash mechine which is close to my house.There was a short queue there so i waited.When it was my turn,i inserted my card only to realize that there was no cash in the stupid mechine.I was not bothered because there  is another mechine about 3mins walk from where i was.When i got there,i met someone who was about to leave.He told me that he wants to withdraw some money but there is no cash in it! Start counting.That is the second useless cash mechine.He asked me if i know of any other and i told him that there is which is about 10mins walk from where we were.We walked and we got there but guess what.Oh yes,there was no cash! That was the third mechine.I could not believe what bad luck fell on me on this fine monday morning.I was running late for work and it usually takes me 45mins to get there but i needed to get a travel card and i could not even withdraw some money!
   The nice guy was kind enough to tell me of another cash mechine which is about another 40 to 50mins walk from our location.Well,i had no choice but to go anyway but i thought of something that might work.I could actaully pay for my travel card by card! That was a solution! I went to the nearest shop and asked the man to give me a travel card.I offered my bank card only for him to tell me that they only accept a card with a chip.that was so annoying because i accually have three bank cards.Two with chips and one without and it was so unfortunate that the card without the chip is the card with the cash.
   I decided to walked to that mechine that guy told me of.It was freezing and my fingers where begining to hurt.I got there crossed my fingers and inserted the card and this i what i saw 'sorry,no withdrawals'. Isnt that annoying?
   I was so upset and i decided to call my place of work and tell them that i cannot make it but i need to think of a good lie.I went back home.My brother in-law helped me with a good one.Usually,when you call,you are to leave a message on voicemail but on this good monday morning(which turned out to be something else)my manager answered the phone.Luckily,i did not fumble.
  I told him that there was an emergency this morning.My flat mate fell down the stairs and is unconscious at the moment.She has been rushed to the hospital and i think she might have broken something. She has a baby and there is no one to look after the child so i have offered to babysit for today.He said that was ok and he is hoping to see me tomorrow! Now who can beat that lie?!! Yes that was naughty but at least i got to seat home,feel warm and say hi to my fellow members!
Born To Bee Great

Offline Bee

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Join Date: Oct 2007
  • Posts: 163
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #3 on: December 17, 2007, 12:07:23 PM »
Hahahaha.That was naughty Muhsin!!!  ;D ;D ;D
Born To Bee Great

Offline sadiq

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Join Date: Oct 2004
  • Location: kano city
  • Posts: 103
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #4 on: December 17, 2007, 12:25:12 PM »
    I woke up early today as usual and got ready for work.I needed to get some cash for my journey so i walk to a cash mechine which is close to my house.There was a short queue there so i waited.When it was my turn,i inserted my card only to realize that there was no cash in the stupid mechine.I was not bothered because there  is another mechine about 3mins walk from where i was.When i got there,i met someone who was about to leave.He told me that he wants to withdraw some money but there is no cash in it! Start counting.That is the second useless cash mechine.He asked me if i know of any other and i told him that there is which is about 10mins walk from where we were.We walked and we got there but guess what.Oh yes,there was no cash! That was the third mechine.I could not believe what bad luck fell on me on this fine monday morning.I was running late for work and it usually takes me 45mins to get there but i needed to get a travel card and i could not even withdraw some money!
   The nice guy was kind enough to tell me of another cash mechine which is about another 40 to 50mins walk from our location.Well,i had no choice but to go anyway but i thought of something that might work.I could actaully pay for my travel card by card! That was a solution! I went to the nearest shop and asked the man to give me a travel card.I offered my bank card only for him to tell me that they only accept a card with a chip.that was so annoying because i accually have three bank cards.Two with chips and one without and it was so unfortunate that the card without the chip is the card with the cash.
   I decided to walked to that mechine that guy told me of.It was freezing and my fingers where begining to hurt.I got there crossed my fingers and inserted the card and this i what i saw 'sorry,no withdrawals'. Isnt that annoying?
   I was so upset and i decided to call my place of work and tell them that i cannot make it but i need to think of a good lie.I went back home.My brother in-law helped me with a good one.Usually,when you call,you are to leave a message on voicemail but on this good monday morning(which turned out to be something else)my manager answered the phone.Luckily,i did not fumble.
  I told him that there was an emergency this morning.My flat mate fell down the stairs and is unconscious at the moment.She has been rushed to the hospital and i think she might have broken something. She has a baby and there is no one to look after the child so i have offered to babysit for today.He said that was ok and he is hoping to see me tomorrow! Now who can beat that lie?!! Yes that was naughty but at least i got to seat home,feel warm and say hi to my fellow members!

Ha ha ha!!! couldnt just help that. you really had some day gal. and the "naughty lie"? you really need some skills and the b***s to do that. hope it isnt a habit of yours ;D  You should pray always before you leave home. sure you 4got to do that today 
oday s beautiful moments are tomorrow s golden memories.

Offline Muhsin

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jul 2006
  • Location: kano
  • Posts: 3107
  • Gender: Male
  • Ikraa bismi Rabbikal lazii khalaq
    • View Profile
    • The Learner
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #5 on: December 17, 2007, 12:34:42 PM »
Hahahaha.That was naughty Muhsin!!!  ;D ;D ;D

My expectation! What predictable!
Get to know [and remember] Allah in prosperity & He will know  [and remember] you in adversity.

Offline HUSNAA

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Dec 2005
  • Location: In Limbo
  • Posts: 2944
  • Gender: Female
  • Life's but the blink of an eye:spend it gratefully
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #6 on: December 17, 2007, 12:35:10 PM »
Lol BEE!! supposing u go to the office the next day or after and someone asks u about yr neighbour or how was the baby sitting and u go all blank?? hahahahaha....
Ghafurallahi lana wa lakum

Offline Bee

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Join Date: Oct 2007
  • Posts: 163
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #7 on: December 17, 2007, 12:43:33 PM »
Hahaha.Husnaa harkin sa nayi imagining dina blank! I'll say...
Ok i'll say that ehmm...
Right, maybe i'll say...i have no idea what to say.Or simply say 'all is well'  ;D
Born To Bee Great

Offline Nuruddeen

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: May 2004
  • Posts: 609
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #8 on: December 17, 2007, 01:23:57 PM »
Lol BEE!! supposing u go to the office the next day or after and someone asks u about yr neighbour or how was the baby sitting and u go all blank?? hahahahaha....


WAI HAUSAWA SUN CE RAMIN KARYA KURARRE NE.LAFS!
o try and fail is atleast to learn. That will save one the inestimable loss of what might have been (positive or negative).

Offline amira

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jan 2006
  • Location: an island
  • Posts: 850
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #9 on: December 17, 2007, 03:29:23 PM »
Ai kuwa bee just be lol ;D
*Each day is definately defining me and finding me*

Offline Dan-Borno

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Jan 2007
  • Location: Maiduguri
  • Posts: 2389
  • Gender: Male
  • EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON
    • View Profile
    • Dan-Borno
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #10 on: December 17, 2007, 06:10:05 PM »
Today today, kai, its not easy to be a man,
went to buy ram at kasuwan shanu market,
these bad guys tried to steal the little cash
i came with, however, with the help of a
friend, we've been able to get the guy and
gave him some 10 dirty slap.

At last i bought the rams, my children were
very happy. 
"My mama always used to tell me: 'If you can't find somethin' to live for, you best find somethin' to die for" - Tupak

Offline Mufi

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Join Date: Sep 2006
  • Posts: 327
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #11 on: December 17, 2007, 11:28:26 PM »
Kai haba DB ai da kunyi mashi hakuri.

Aci naman Sallah lafiya, and remember not to over eat at one time.
Life is like a flower; more exquisite and precious when shared with others.

Offline HUSNAA

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Dec 2005
  • Location: In Limbo
  • Posts: 2944
  • Gender: Female
  • Life's but the blink of an eye:spend it gratefully
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #12 on: December 18, 2007, 06:56:04 AM »
Today today, kai, its not easy to be a man,
went to buy ram at kasuwan shanu market,
these bad guys tried to steal the little cash
i came with,
however, with the help of a
friend, we've been able to get the guy and
gave him some 10 dirty slap.

At last i bought the rams, my children were
very happy. 
The little cash ... kai DB. Lallai DB yanzu munsan category din da za musa ka in.. amongst the su DanGotes for whom money no matter the amount is chicken change!!   ;D
Ghafurallahi lana wa lakum

Offline waduz

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Dec 2006
  • Posts: 546
  • even the blind struggles to see!
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #13 on: December 18, 2007, 08:57:30 AM »
When first I came accross this thread, I just brushed it aside thinking that it makes no serious sense. But this morning I felt otherwise. You see, my driver was waiting outside to take me to the office. I came out and grabbed the door opener which just fell on the ground. The driver had to open the door from the inside for me to get in. Immediately I got in, he said the player is damaged. We arrived the office and I tried logging into my computer three times, unsuccessfully. The pc kept telling me you have to log in from an administrator's account. The IT people had to intervene before I lost my temper(rature) ;D ;D ;D

Offline ummita

  • Super Member
  • *****
  • Join Date: Oct 2002
  • Location: Straight from Ruff Endz
  • Posts: 1343
    • View Profile
Re: NAUGHTY NAUGHTY.
« Reply #14 on: December 19, 2007, 04:18:42 AM »

Free time, nothing doing, might aswell…….
Mines, naughty meets naughty………..

Who knows one of those days you wake up and feel you don’t give a zero about life? Well I was in that zone yesterday. The only thing I did after waking up around 2;45pm was prayers. I just wanted to croon besides I was abit sick. I decided to roll and puff out on my lazy chair and be a couch potato. I was so lazy to cook and havent done so in 3wks but Lord, thanks to the inventors of indomie. I love indomieeeeee noodles. Best snack quickies ever! Especially when you feel to lazy to cook, just pull out a bowl, break your indomie and add milk. I decided to spend the whole day in bed and flick through channels or watch a couple of movies. I even had my phones off and the two persons in my life were out and I taught yay, God you love me so!!! And thanks for answering my prayer- to sit and pamper myself rotten to a quite day.  I decided to put my phone back on and listen to my voice messages. Lol lol first one was from my mum telling me off for not calling my granny, second was some silly reminder from a friend, third was a really sweet message as usual, fourth, I screamed! It just felt like coming out of a horror film. I was petrified and very livid. I started moaning between gritted teeth and talking to myself in bed. I was moaning because all I wanted was serenity between the walls of my sanctuary, but nope, my aunt was on her way. That’s fine, but she was coming with Hamid. OH DEAR LORD! Hamid turned 3yrs few days back and was on their way to my house!! I quickly grabbed the phone and rang back but couldn’t get through. I kept trying to reach my aunt on several accounts but all in vein. I finally got through and it was around 4:20pm. I taught at last. The was a hello from the other side, I blurted out quickly and trying to catch my breath: “Anti Muni…ya dai yazun naji message naki infact yanzu zen tefi asibiti, but I will pop by tomorrow. She said ai we are just walking up to your door! Dang!!! I got off my bed, never minding tripping and falling over edge, I went for the window and opened the curtains and they were!!! $%”@ beep!. I was acting like a criminal in my own domain. I quickly ran over not exactly knowing what I was trying to do next. I am not gonna lie, I don’t like that little boy at all. He is such an adorable baby, the cutest I’ve seen but lurking beneath that little angel is a devil. Give him five minutes and your home will be upside down. I ran down like I have seen a ghost but instead on going out to receive them, I went straight into the lounge. First things first! Move all breakable items. Hide my own stuffy animals (yep! not shamed, just 4 deco) lol. I moved all the decorations on my mantle piece. I laid everything right in the middle of the dining table out of that boys reach. My eye fell on my box of éclairs sweet and I trushed it behind the sofa, I shifted my Qur’an at arms length. I tell you that is how that boy can make you loose your mind in secs. I hurriedly slipped my legs into different pairs of shoes and went to collect them outside. I ran back, jerked open my door and believe me I froze immediately my gaze fell on him clinging to my mum by her neck and a stupid toy, which looks like a train to me. I stood for a minute or two forgetful, and then it dawned on me that I was meant to look happy and welcome my aunty into mine. I did an act-of- make-believe and ushered them. Me and kids, no-no-no, not the best of both worlds but I try to get along with them but the trauma they can put a person through Innalillahi!!. Anyway I gathered all my strength and pulled him from his mum to give him a hug but the little piece of s***t screamed like he’s seen a ghoul. His mum chuckled saying he was clingy, 3yr old? Kewya? (hiss). I ended up cooking, something I haven’t done for like 3wks. We all sat to eat and he didn’t want his food but mine. I pushed my plate for him and the first the kid did was break my plate, stain my rug with food mess and then shrieked because he wanted his food back! Eventually he didn’t even eat and went off the sitting area, pulled down my CD rail, which knocked my a little miniature of the Ka’abah. It took me all my might to hold myself down. I was up to here!!!! I was tempted to do something bad, but I just couldn’t see myself hitting a child. His mum excused herself to go pray and I was left with Hamid. He stood there glaring at me as I glared at him back, bulging my eyes out to scare him away from whatever he had next on his agenda. I didn’t know he could climb chair but the next thing I heard was a loud bang. I ran to the dining from the kitchen where I was trying to clean up and lord……..my crystals, my crystal, my crystals, you can destroy anything but not thosee!!! I didn’t know when I pulled him down and gave him a real pinch and pulled hard on his cheek. The kid yelled and pulled away from me in protest. As I bent to pick my broken stuff, fuming and feeling irritated and wishing they would just live like right now, I raised my face and I couldn’t block what I saw coming. Hamid has a spoon in his hand aimed at me, he whacked it right on the bone of my nose. I was in pain. I didn’t know when I started crying. His mum this time made an entry. And she was like what happened? I taught, what happened? What happened? Am the one in tears here and your son is standing looking sheepish with an act of guilt on his face and you are asking me what happened!!!. Instead of scolding him, he was given a piggyback because he looked sulky. You spoilt piece of “I don’t even know what nomenclature to use on you”! The kid ended up following me to the kitchen whilst I was cleaning up and he was so slick in his art of destroying that you wouldn’t know what he is doing until the damage is done. He opened my fridge and ended up breaking 4 eggs. I was steering tea and I didn’t know when I took my hot spoon outta my cup and sticked it to his arm. Tit for that!! I’ve had enough. He screamed and his mum ran-in, like the world was coming to an end. He held his hand screaming. Mammah, aunti, hannu babi! Babi! Babi,(zafi). Auntie Mummiya ne, Aunti mummiya ne. She asked what had happened and I told her he must have banged his hand because I didn’t know I was making him tea. Of course I lied. What’s also frustrating is the way he stresses out the Auntieeeeeeeeeeee bit to my name. Makes me feel really old!! He went back for my fridge tiptoeing and trying to get something out. I asked him what he wanted, he said cha-chop (Ketchup). I told him that it was hot chilli sauce but he just wont have it. He threw himself on the floor and made a fit. Something evil came over me. I poured the chilli in a teaspoon and pushed it down his mouth. At first no reaction, in minutes he was screaming and pouring out saliva. I quickly went out of the kitchen.(she laffs) I overheard his mum, saying baby Hamid, barna kayi ma auntin ka koh? I pretended to be coming downstairs and asked why was Hamid crying and she said yeah I think he ate pepper. I wanted to crack up and I said oh dear, I ended up feeling guilty and pulling out the packet of éclairs I hid in my sofa to give him. We sat to chat with my aunt and the next thing was a blast. Hamid was at it again, this time playing with the volume control to my stereo and dancing to Duran, Duran(wildboys). I switched it to a low tempo song, my favourite, The Commodores-(Night shift) and this boy made a deafening scream. When we put it back to wildboys he begins to jump and dance and I looked at my aunty thinking he is definitely WILD. To cut the stereo story, he ended up pushing a fork and jamming it into the stereo. I taught I have had enough. I tried pulling him away and he kept pulling at my hair and hitting me. The mum went off to pray and I was plain evil, I kept pinching off his chick till he cried so bad, since he could not talk I might aswell repay evil for evil. My aunt came back and said he was feeling sleepy and she will take him up my room and I taught……awwww lord, not my room plzzzzzzzzzzz. I went to check up on them, and found both mother and child sleeping and I noticed a design, which was not meant to be on my bed covers- purple lipsticks drawn over and half the contents of my dresser on was the floor. My door rang and I was so relieved to see the person at the door who asked why my nose was red. Oh! That! Hamid gave me a hit! I turned back and walked away tittle-tattling and running my mouth in whispers, cursing at Hamid’s dirty ways. I was making comments on how I felt that he was a spoilt child, no way will I tolerate such a behaviour if he was under my training and was saying you wont believe which of my crystal got broken today, kai the boy is spoilt, he is worse than a terror. They haven’t trained him blah blah blah, he even messed up the stereo! All along not a word from the person I was reporting to, then I turned round and asked: what sup with you; and behold, Hamid’s dad was behind the person I was talking to. I taught…………abracadabra - let the grounds open and swallow me in. The shame!!! The shame I cannot forfeit to bear. I just stood there and it was like for the first time I realized that my mouth was missing. I just hanged my head down in shame. My uncle said, lallai Antin Hamid kenan. I just wanted to die!!!! My voice went low as I greeted him and ushered for him to come in. Instead he told me not to bother to tell Munira to meet him in the car, he came to collect them. I taught mennnnnnnnnnnn!!!! Why didn’t I just check to see if was another person at my door? My aunt and Hamid left and I was in shame for the rest of the day. I rang my aunt this morning to say hi thinking her husband will tell her what I did, but the husband picked up and I was like uncle Ibrahim, you home early today. He replied. Uwar Hamid me zagin yaron nata. Shooo! I couldn’t play off the embarrassment in my voice. But my uncle acted cool but said Hamid fell off the stair this morning and dislocated his hand and he has swallowed the train driver of his toy. I didn’t know when I cracked up real bad after hanging up the phone. And don’t think I was heartless but the swallowing part was all too funny. I was just imagining the hyperactive boy from yesterday and what he did to me, and who I insulted a tiny pinch, but ended getting shamed for all his wrongdoings only for bad luck to befall him. And pls don’t say he is a child! It will just frustrate me the more! Anyway Hamid is in good shape but I couldn’t help laughing evil under my breath……..Naughty repays naughty!

Despite ur slammin, am still jammin!!!

 


Powered by EzPortal