Author Topic: Another Woman  (Read 8692 times)

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Offline Konan

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Another Woman
« on: January 19, 2008, 03:29:36 PM »
Hey guys this is a short descriptive story that i had written about a woman who is married but jealous of his dead wife and dead son its all about jealousy, guilt and revenge enjoy!!!! :D

He took her out onto the terrance in the early morning sunshine and held her hand while he spoke of what had happened in Sicily seven years ago. Hannah listened, watching his face, judging every inotation in his voice. She saw the pain in his eyes as he relived the nightmare of teh devastated hospital. When he spoke of finding the bracelet with her bloodstains dried on it, he looked away.

"Nobody told my father about this, " she said. "That wasn't very honourable."

"Nobody knew," Andrew protested. "You are the only person in the world I've told about it. They're dead and it's over. I love you Hannah. I don't know how it ahppened last night, but you've got to forget it."

"You didn't have to marry her." She spoke quite coldly now. "She wasn't Sicilian. How did you know the child was yours? How many other men did she bed besides you?"

He felt a sudden flare of anger. "Don't ever talk about her that way, Hannah. I've told you, she's dead and you don't need to be jealous. Now get changed we'll go for a walk.

"What did she look like?"
He felt the anger come again at her persistence. He wanted to hurt her for what she had said about Vanessa and teh child. "Not like you. Blonde and blue-eyed. Very pretty." He turned to go inside. "I've told you to get changed."

I don't have to be jealous she told herself. She's dead, she and her child. But I heard her her name cried out instead of mine and I saw the look on his face when he talked about her. I could go to my father and he'd know what to do. But she's dead, and I can't touch her...

They sailed to Europe on a private ship called The Waves. They were reconciled because they had to be. There was too much at stake beyond their personal happiness and they accepted this in their different ways.

Andrew argued with himself that Hannah was still very young and her parenst ahd spoiled her rotten. But she loved him and he knew he must come to terms with her jealousy. It would pass in time as she matured and her self-confidence grew.
She was a child at heart, he thought; extravagant, impulsive, demanding. The extremes of her nature suprised him. underneath the facade of culture and education there lurked a primitive Italian woman, single-minded in her love, black-hearted in her hatred. Also clever.

It all went wrong in Monte Carlo. Hannah accused Andrew about staring at a woman at the casino they had gone to. Back at the hotel she tore off her necklace and earrings and threw them wildly accross the room. "You stood there staring at that B....," she shouted. "I saw you! Blonde like that other W....!"

He didnt slap her. He didnt trust himself. He looked at the screaming fury a few feet away from him, then turned and walked out of the bedroom.
He heard something smash as he closed the door. He went downstairs to the bar.
The abr was quite full. He wasn't interested in the people. He needed to sit somehwere alone and put down the drink as fast as possible. What the hell am I doing with her he asked himself. He thought he was in love with her; he wasn't. He had blinded himself with the desire and advantages of combining forces with the Fabrizzi family. And with her female instinct she divined the truth. A life of hell yawned at their feet unless something could be done. He hated her jelousy that exploded into violent temper; in a few years she would be a shrew.

Hannah suffered. Her life had been protected against the least disappointment or frustration. Now she was driven mad by teh pain of loving her husband and not possesing him entirely. Suspicion tortured her, so that she watched him constantly. She tried to please him and was never sure she had suceeded. The ghost of a dead woman mocked her in Andrew's arms. Also the ghost of a dead child. She would have to win Andrew and teh way to do it was to give him a son as quickly as she could.


Hope you guys enjoyed it :D

Offline Muhsin

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #1 on: January 19, 2008, 05:01:03 PM »
Oh...don't have that much time to read it now. But when I get back. Gud!
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Offline HUSNAA

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #2 on: January 24, 2008, 10:56:18 AM »
That was very very good Lady M. The only thing I'd recommend u to do is to change the name Hannah to Anna. It sounds more Italian than Hannah. Hannah sounds very jewish. I am not saying there is anything wrong with it, but its not convincing for the daughter of a mafia family.
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Offline Konan

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2008, 12:18:45 AM »
dats tru husna thnx i'll do dat :D

Offline Muhsin

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #4 on: January 26, 2008, 01:29:05 PM »
Hi Ladymerciful,

I read your story since. I’m not sure if it was because I wasn’t sure, what to say, that I, then, didn’t make a reply. No. My computer while trying that hooked and thats all.

Your story was absolutely enjoying and nice. Wish you could write more of it and even a whole novel in time to come.

But what I don't understand well is; what justification did you arrive at before giving your story that title? Can you pls say more about it because I failed to grasp the actual relation between the story and the title. Didn't say there is none but whats is it?

Thanks and keep it up.
Get to know [and remember] Allah in prosperity & He will know  [and remember] you in adversity.

Offline HUSNAA

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #5 on: January 27, 2008, 10:18:06 AM »
lol Muhsin dont be obtuse.. there was another woman.. her name is vanessa. she was married to the husband of hannah but has since died in an accident? and hannah is jealous of the dead vanessa and the dead kid.. that is the present context of the story....
« Last Edit: January 27, 2008, 10:20:15 AM by HUSNAA »
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Offline Muhsin

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2008, 11:56:46 AM »
lol Muhsin dont be obtuse.. there was another woman.. her name is vanessa. she was married to the husband of hannah but has since died in an accident? and hannah is jealous of the dead vanessa and the dead kid.. that is the present context of the story....

Hmm...Husnaa, you know how at times an individual would, let me call it unreasonably and surprisingly fail to fathom something thats to other(s) very plain and well-explained. Am still sorry for myself but I'm yet to get this actual bond relation. Why does it refer to that dead woman? Why not, if the title remain as it is, to the present jealous woman since she's the one we see and hear about?

Any way, where are you ladymerciful? Wish you're doing fine.
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Offline HUSNAA

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #7 on: January 29, 2008, 04:41:02 AM »
well the other one was dead obviously, and this one was also married to the same man that married the dead woman so she cant be referred to as the other woman. Usually the term 'other woman' refers to a man's mistress in relation to his wife. So maybe in that sense u are right, she shouldnt be referred to as the other woman, but I dont think LMfl was thinking along those lines when she referred to the deceased first wife as the other woman. I believe, (though I dont know since its not my story) that LMfl makes the first wife the other woman from the point of view of the second wife who was not comfortable with the legitimacy of the union btw her husband and his deceased wife..( 'u shouldnt have married her!') and also she thinks the dead first wife tricked the husband into marrying her, so maybe that is why she (the second wife) refers to the first wife as the other woman...
Anyway ask Lady M about it.. its all conjectures on my part.
« Last Edit: January 29, 2008, 04:46:38 AM by HUSNAA »
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Offline Muhsin

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #8 on: January 29, 2008, 11:56:12 AM »
But you have at least tried very well Husnaa. You too, I understand, have grasped my doubt about  the meaning and the relation of the title to the context of the story. Lets wait for the writer's elucidation and what have you. Thanks.
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Offline Konan

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #9 on: February 03, 2008, 12:40:14 AM »
lol guys u know i never finished the novel but vanessa isnt dead she's actually alive she left scicily before the bomb hit the hospital she was working at and before she had left she gave her bracelet to her best friend who worked at the hospital. so when andrew found the bracelet he thought it was vanessa but actually that bracelet was on vanessa friend who died instead.

vanessa went back to england because she was pregnant. also she foudn out that andrew's family belonged to the mafia so she didnt want her child to be bought up in that environment.

anyway the main plot of the story is hannah finds out vanessa is still alive as does andrew. hannah devots her life to revenge and wants to kill hannah aswell as andrew for betraying her and running off with his 1st wife blah blah blah lol

so now do you think another woman is the right title???

Offline Muhsin

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #10 on: February 04, 2008, 10:54:18 AM »
Welcome back ladymerciful.

I now see the actual bond. And the title, I can say, is good and relates the contextual meaning of the story, really.

Thanks for the clrification.
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Offline Konan

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Re: Another Woman
« Reply #11 on: February 04, 2008, 12:24:43 PM »
ur welcome glad it all worked out jus fine lol

 


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