Concerning marriage: What do u tink bout dis?

[Anonymous]

Oh shucks, I was hoping Ibrahim really did write that but I guess it was wishful thinking. I mean, a guy would really need to be in touch with his feminine side to say ALL THAT! But Allahu a^alam maybe a man DID write it ! Super !!

Speaking of lada, marrying more wives doesn't give a guy $200 every time he passes go, ie, there's no automatic deposit to the lada bank for additional marriages... It all depends on niyya and the circumstances. Allah knows best.

[Anonymous]

Assalamu Alaikum,

My apology please, I went off for sometime; breaking the strong family link without notice. Ah! Dan-Sokoto is "striking". Why? Dan-Sokoto for what?  Is it your "titlement" or entitlement.?  Ina Salisu ne?!!! Yaya kabari haka ya faru?!!!!!!!!!

Ihsan, Fulanicious kdgirl ; it was great, i felt flattered by ur comments. truly poetry, romance and beauty are what we live for, as the prophet of Islam would say: "Poetry is the bastion of wisdom and in oratory is charm.

A'a Aminuddeen yaya akayine? kudi da kake gani is very important in life. It is a determinant in many things not marriage exclusive. That was why Allah would caution us is Suratul Nur that we should hold back in the affairs of marriage if we don't have the means until when He extend His bounties(riches) unto us. Please u can check it out. It is entirely different from being afraid of poverty as you tried to eluscidate.

Waziri

[Anonymous]

Salam
Malam you're right. I did try to ari bakinka in ci albasa.
What I meant to convey has to do with what other respondents wrote as their replies to a different topic. My mistake of not mentioning exactly who I am referring to must have totally convoluted my reply.
Do accept from me , Yallabai, apologies for misunderstanding what you wrote.
To be frank, i did not even read your write up, just replying that said article,\.
I normally dont do things like this, Dan sokoto zai iye mani shaida.
Yallabai, Allah shi bada hakuri.
Muhammad

[Blaqueen]

Posted by: kdgirl Posted on: 10/25/02 at 4:14pm
$200 every time he passes go, ie, there's no automatic deposit to the lada bank for additional marriages... It all depends on niyya and the circumstances. Allah knows best.




LoL!!!!! right on point!........ u go gurl!  ;D haha automatic deposit.... *hiss* dont mind dem negroes.... ;)

[ummita]

mhmmm about this topic....... :-X :-X[/b]

[Ibro2g]

Dan sokoto ????,
that isn't a proper reason of marrying 2 ,3 or 4. islam allowed u to,amma with conditions , and u know "ana barin halal don kunya " :-/

 ;Dlol queen and kdgurl hahaa ;D...I'm sorry but I cant help it. "Ana barin halal dan kunya :P ;D.... hahaha. Gurlz I'm really sorry. 8) ::)

You know, I cant condemn multiple marriages coz its religion but personally I dont like it either... I mean its nothing but trouble, both here and the hereafter. There are little, very little men who both have the means and have the will... and do the just for the wives...but in our modernized hearts, we cant, I know I cant. This heart is for one woman only lol ::) :-*.
Picture it this way, even btwn ur parents, u'll like one better than the other, or at least be closer to one, and those wid kidz, u know that too. So to ur wives...huh! our hearts are no longer designed wid the special partitioning attribute, and even if they where, there is no control.
Mind u MEN: The prophet said, marry one...UPTO four IF you could.... you know the rest. The important words I have brought out (upto and if). If this means being weak then yes I am weak, but I admit, I cant marry more than a wife...thats why I must be very careful while selecting HER ::) 8). the rest of u do as u please...IF u could. :-X

Lastly I cant leave without thanking my bestest poet: Wazz, ur good man, what an article...this should bi on time or som`n of such.  8)

[adama]

dan sokoto,no offence.ai idan baka chika ladan ka ba,lallai kuwa zaka chika alhakin ka.ai one man one wife kawai,its safer for everyone.wai i'm not trying to reject what Allah has allowed but duniyannan yanzu sai adu'a.may Allah help us all.

[ummita]

dan sokoto,no offence.ai idan baka chika ladan ka ba,lallai kuwa zaka chika alhakin ka.ai one man one wife kawai,its safer for everyone.wai i'm not trying to reject what Allah has allowed but duniyannan yanzu sai adu'a.may Allah help us all.

she laffs, spot on gurl.....u tell 'em, but still ni dai 4 this topic :-X

[Blaqueen]

wai tsaya.. who come tell u say that "four" wives is religion? ku bar sapo faaaaaa!...
Islam did NOT introduce polygamy!.. did NOT!.. it LIMITED polygamy...
polygamy is tradition!

[Borg]

The objective and the goal of marriage in Islam according to the Quran is to enable us to dwell in peace and tranquility. It is important for us to reflect on these words and their significance in the Islamic frame of reference.

In order to have peace certain condition must be met. These prerequisites to peace are Justice, Fairness, Equity, Equality, and fulfillment of mutual rights. Therefore any injustice whether it is oppression, or persecution, cannot be tolerated if there is to be peace in Muslim homes.

In the domestic realm oppression is manifested when the process of Shura (consultation) is compromised, neglected or ignored. When one partner (in most cases the husband) makes unilateral decisions and applies dictatorial style of leadership, peace is compromised. Persecution is present when there is any form of domestic abuse being perpetrated.

Tranquility on the other hand is a state of being which is achieved when peace has been established. Tranquility is compromised when there is tension, stress and anger. It is a mistake to take tranquility to mean perpetual state of bliss. Since being Muslims does not make us immune to tragedies and catastrophes.

In fact Allah tells us in the Quran that we will be tried (2:155,57). What a state of tranquility does is to empower us to handle life's difficult moments with our spouses as obedient servants of Allah. Allah in His infinite Mercy also provides us with the tools by which we can achieve this state of peace and tranquility.

The second principle besides Shura on which the Islamic family life is based is Mercy (Rehma), and in this verse Allah is telling us that He has placed mercy between spouses. We are therefore inclined by our very nature to have mercy for our spouses. Mercy is manifested through compassion, forgiveness, caring and humility.

It is obvious that these are all ingredients that make for a successful partnership. Marriage in Islam is above all a partnership based on equality of partners and specification of roles. Lack of mercy in a marriage or a family renders it in Islamic terms dysfunctional.

Allah further states that He has also placed in addition to mercy, love between spouses. It should however be noted that Islamic concept of love is different from the more commonly understood romantic love so valued in the Western cultures.

The basic difference is that love between man and woman in the Islamic context can only be realized and expressed in a legal marriage. In order to develop a healthy avenue for the expression of love between man and woman and to provide security so that such a loving relationship can flourish, it is necessary to give it the protection of Shariah (Islamic law).

Marital love in Islam inculcates the following:

Faith: The love Muslim spouses have for each other is for the sake of Allah that is to gain His pleasure. It is from Allah that we claim our mutual rights (Quran 4:1) and it is to Allah that we are accountable for our behavior as husbands and wives.

It sustains: Love is not to consume but to sustain. Allah expresses His love for us by providing sustenance. To love in Islam is to sustain our loved one physically, emotionally, spiritually and intellectually, to the best of our ability (to sustain materially is the husbands duty, however if the wife wishes she can also contribute)

Accepts: To love someone is to accept them for who they are. It is selfishness to try and mould someone as we wish them to be. True love does not attempt to crush individuality or control personal differences, but is magnanimous and secure to accommodate differences.

Challenges: Love challenges us to be all we can, it encourages us to tap into our talents and takes pride in our achievements. To enable our loved one to realize their potential is the most rewarding experience.

Merciful: Mercy compels us to love and love compels us to have mercy. In the Islamic context the two are synonymous. The attribute Allah chose to be the supreme for Himself is that He is the most Merciful. This attribute of Rehman (the Merciful) is mentioned 170 times in the Quran, bringing home the significance for believers to be merciful. Mercy in practical application means to have and show compassion and to be charitable.

Forgiving: Love is never too proud to seek forgiveness or too stingy to forgive. It is willing to let go of hurt and letdowns. Forgiveness allows us the opportunity to improve and correct our selves.

Respect: To love is to respect and value the person their contributions and their opinions. Respect does not allow us to take for granted our loved ones or to ignore their input. How we interact with our spouses reflects whether we respect them or not.

Confidentiality: Trust is the most essential ingredient of love. When trust is betrayed and confidentiality compromised, love loses its soul.

Caring: Love fosters a deep fondness that dictates caring and sharing in all that we do. The needs of our loved ones take precedence over our own.

Kindness: The Seerah (biography) of our beloved Prophet is rich with examples of acts of kindness, he showed towards his family and particularly his wives. Even when his patience was tried, he was never unkind in word or deed. To love is to be kind.

Grows: Marital love is not static it grows and flourishes with each day of marital life. It requires work and commitment, and is nourished through faith when we are thankful and appreciative of Allah blessings.

Enhances: Love enhances our image and beautifies our world. It provides emotional security and physical well being.

Selflessness: Love gives unconditionally and protects dutifully.

Truthful: Love is honesty without cruelty and loyalty without compromise.

[Blaqueen]

i juss made that sound we make with our throats... the *clicky* sound

na wa ooo... make i print it out! and give to.. well , y'know.....

[ummita]

wai tsaya.. who come tell u say that "four" wives is religion? ku bar sapo faaaaaa!...
Islam did NOT introduce polygamy!.. did NOT!.. it LIMITED polygamy...
polygamy is tradition!

Well I think its not compulsory, but Allah SWT stated  that if u can and u can show equality amonsgt them then one is eligible to marry up to 4 wives...........

The prohpet married..Khadija, Sawdah,Aisha, Hafsah,Umm Habibah, Umm Salmah, Zaynab bint Jahsh, Maymunah, Juwayriyya(as kanawaz pronouce it as Zuwaira) & Safiyah,

So as long as a man treats them equal. I say.... y not...a man shud marry all 4 but if he cant bear d task of showin equal treatent he shud stick 2 one.

But 4 marraige....I hearby :-X :-X :-X

[Ibro2g]

But 4 marraige....I hearby :-X :-X :-X

Umiitah, why are u sooo so so scared of marriage? if u dont mind mi askin`?

[rouqayya]

hi ibrahim, i totally agree with you on the islamic aspect of marriage.but dont you think finding a partner in these present time is a tricky business? i mean i always thought of marriage as a gamble...u never know what to expect until ure in it. ???.and i belive that finding a husban/wife too is coz most p'ple just want to get married and will pretend to fit into ur profile untill after the marriage then u c what there trully made of and u realise they were'nt what you bargained for! so as for me (even though some might find this shocking), i'll say is go with the flow coz u never really know a person untill uve married him, after all if he/she turns out to b sumthg else, as discouraging and bitter as it may ,be u can always divorce and move on untill u find your mr right ...or is it right now?

[Ibro2g]

Wallahi roukkah, u r right. Infact everyone is gambling right now, running after mister/miss right now, if the chosen one is found, the one part gradually disappears as I heard. The mmean time....keep playing :D ;D ::) 8) ;)